The selection Kado and Pena
by Wingsoffire2102
Summary: Kado is firstborn, heir to Illea along with his three younger brothers. All four of the brothers must go through a selection, some more pleased with the event than others. Kado is the most reserved of his siblings, hoping to keep to himself for as long as humanely possible (and he has good reason for it ;) But the selection offers Kado something he'd never thought he'd find.
1. Chapter 1

The Selection; a tradition my country held its pride on for over 100 years...

What a fucking joke.

When I think back to every single story father used to tell me and my brothers about it, all I can remember is staring out the window in sheer boredom. 35 eligible women, he said. 35 women and only one will win over your heart. He sounded like a bad romantic comedy movie staring a single hot actress with losers to fight over along with a pushy parent. Maybe the selection was just a remake of twilight.

My brothers didn't seem so repulsed by the thought. They sat at his knee, wide eyed, thinking of the 35 girls, all pretty, all submissive, all complete idiots. To them it was all fun and games and a chance to actually talk to a woman who wasn't just a maid. Being the oldest took the fun out of it for me.

Three. Three younger brothers. Kent, Kine, and Harry. 18, 17, and 16 all a single year apart. Expect for me. No I was a real handful and apparently my parents thought it better to wait till my third birthday to have another child. You see, my brothers were born with beautiful hair, beautiful eyes, perfect little faces of angels and temperaments matching all the same.

My hair was red. Not like a ginger, soft and orange in the sun. Mine was assaulting, red like blood and fire, eyes brown and dull like god had decided to make me look like the devil. He also decided I wasn't to be particularly smart like Kent or charming like Kine or innocent like Harry. No the three of them had their place in my father's heart, the three boys that our whole kingdom looked to. God let me take a back seat to it all, with one final curse.

Although I couldn't blame father for having higher expectations for his first born, the king had always been rather kind to me as well. But everything always had to be perfect. I had to smile, but not stay too quite. I had to answer the questions concisely and precisely. I had to be the heir that he would one day present as the king of his country.

I admired him. I truly did. I admired his generosity and care for the world around him but there was never any connection between us. I didn't even look like him or act like him. I wasn't even sure if I was his heir at all sometimes.

But mother was different. I still remember her soft hands caressing my hair, the mess that it was, singing her lovely little hims to me as my head rested on her lap.

"Isn't it lovely, all alone, heart of glass and mind of stone," she'd sing her angelic voice resonating in my ears as we sat in the forests together, her hand still caressing the locks of hair so peacefully, the sun shifting in the sky above us. The winds whispered to one another, carrying my mother's voice with them into the mountains.

All alone, we sat against the forest, no guards surrounding us, no watchful eyes asking for news of the queen and her prince. Our only company was the rustling leaves above, the slight whistle of air through the tree bark, and my mother's songs. I hold onto that memory every night of my life as I cannot fall asleep. I hold onto it when I can't convince myself that the world will every understand who I am. I hold onto my mother in my dreams still, because she is the only one who can ever know...

The selection may be what the country needs, what tradition calls for. And my brothers and I will go through it as we must for better or worse. And even if I refuse to let anyone in the world know me like my mother once did, I'll go through it, and I'll do it. I'll do it for my mother and the love she had for her country.

* * *

Today's the day, the day all 35 girls get drawn, the most wonderful and stupendous opportunity of our lives and a day of rejoice for the kingdom!

"Yeah, no, today wasn't a good day and this was only going to make it worse. For starters, I woke up an hour too late because the fucking sun decided not to be bright enough to wake me. Then I had to proceed to the breakfast table (which I usually tend to avoid because that would require talking to the asshats in my family) only to be cornered by noble shit heads who wouldn't stop asking me about the selection which hasn't. even. begun. yet. They also ate all the toast which I don't even know how its possible that the kitchen ran out of fucking bread.

"It's bread.

"Come on.

"I knew I should've refused to do this stupid charade. My brothers are excited as hell because for some reason I got to convince my dad to let the three idiots take a shot at the the 35 girls too. Sure it makes things a little complicated with eliminations and shit, but at least it takes some of the attention away from me being awkward in front of the entire kingdom.

"The rest of the day was spent with my dad trying to convince me to cut my hair and dye it a little lighter so it wouldn't "assault the eyes so much" what a great guy, I mean really.

"Keeping my hair the same as always, I mustered the courage to get up in front of the cameras.

Standing in front of a podium with millions of people watching either on TV or in front of the castle, all I can think about is the morning and how fucking miserable it was and how I couldn't eat any bread.

"Kado," Harry whispered, standing next to me as he elbowed my side. Caught off guard, I looked down at him in question.

"I think this is the part where you come in," He whispered, his light blue hair smoked with silver dangled over his even bluer eyes. He really was a cute little boy, always so gentle voiced like our mother. Girls saw him more like a puppy than a man, although at 16 he could stand to eat a bit more and maybe spend some time working out or something.

"Right," I said, thinning my lips into a straight line before continuing.

"And now the candidates for the selection."

Being the oldest was fun don't get me wrong. I got to boss basically everyone around since I was the heir. I was also the biggest which came in handy when I wanted something one of my brothers had "accidentally" taken from my room. But sometimes it sucked. I had to do all the public speaking, be first in the interviews, work with dad in his office, and be aware of everything at all times.

Oh ya and I had to read the stupid names.

"Kasia Lionheart," Suddenly the image of a thin, tall girl with a perfect face appeared in my mind, and I couldn't have been more bored with it. At least my hopes that the names would be at least a little bit original were not disappointed. But after a few, the names all started to blend together and suddenly I found myself reciting, pausing, reciting, pausing, forgetting what I was doing in the first place.

"Beatrix Hunting," It was only at the eleventh name that I realized the pictures of all the girls were appearing on the screen above me.

"Wow," I heard Harry whisper as he looked back at one of the younger girls. She was quite beautiful he wasn't wrong, but something in her eyes told me she was looking for more than someone to love in a prince.

"Fawn Triber,"

"Ter Roivena," Oh great a Russian.

31 down. Four to go

"Yuiani Caliber,"

"three,

"Verinici Wales,"

two,

"Katheryn June,"

one.

"Pena," The last girl did not have a last name, ironically. I shifted on my feet slightly at the name, a familiarity ringing in its midst.

Pena, like the name of a temptress in a play I was sure I'd read before.

"Thank you to all the women and girls who participated in the drawing and welcome to the lucky 35. I think I can speak for my brothers, when I say we are all very pleased to have you here," Putting the papers down, I glanced down at Harry his large smile and waves at the crowd hiding the excitement in him. I couldn't help but crook a corner of my mouth as I watched him struggle to keep himself under control. He would've been jumping around in private.

Kent and Kine stood much more composed, smiling only the slightest bit and waving at the crowd gone mad with applause.

Yes. They were happy too. It seemed the entire world was happy in that moment.

The selected, newly thrilled at the prospect of husbands and princes and castles.

My brothers, looking forward to new faces, new experiences they longed for.

The country, simply happy to finally have a distraction from the wars that plagued our kingdom.

Me. I think I could be happy. Just for the sake of it, I look up at the sky for a moment without tilting my head. Silently I ask mother, hoping her answers will be carried back in the forest's winds.

* * *

"What!? That's not fair!" I literally never thought I could get so annoyed by a single person in my life until the selection began.

Father had laid out all 35 profiles on the common room table before us, urging us to know as much as possible about possible candidates. Kent, Kine, Harry, and I were all sorting through, going through the applications, health records, school records, resumes, etc. With every app I felt less and less like these girls were people, and more and more like business proposals to choose from. Granted it was hard to focus when Kine kept whining.

"How come we all pick from the same pool?" He asked, seeming spoiled as ever.

"He's right father, it would be more logical if we restricted each girl to us by age," the smart ass agreed with the brat. That was a rare occasion.

"If you would have me take every seventeen year old and match it up with you, Kine, every eighteen year old and match them up with you Kent, which by the way is the majority of the women, there would be less ten girls left for Kado and Harry," Harry's eyes peaked up from behind one of the applications as he heard his name. I let out a humored breath at his childish nature.

"Dad, I'm just saying that if we get the same shot at every girl, they're all gonna go after Kado." Taking my glasses off, I threw down the app I had been pretending to read and rocked by chair back on two of its four legs.

"Hm?" I questioned, perhaps a tad pretentiously. Kine rolled his eyes and began pacing like he did.

"He's the heir, he's the oldest, and he's the tallest which means if they marry him they become the queen." Kent said, side eyeing me judgmentally.

"What does height have to do with it?" Harry questioned, allowing me to laugh once more.

"Kado," Father warned, his hands resting on the table as he put his weight on his shoulders.

"Get your feet off the table and if you don't put your chair down properly I will knock you right out of it," Putting my hands up in defeat, I obeyed, winking at Harry as I hyper arched my back to seem all the more kingly in a mocking sort of way. Harry had to try and keep himself from giggling.

"Kent, my boy," father began, a signal of a long speech coming down over the horizon.

"If these girls are worth marrying, they will show interest in whoever shows them kindness," I swear to god it was like he was reading from a teenage girl's romance novel.

"As long as you respect them, give them the attention they deserve, and treat them as ladies, I am sure they will treat all of you as the eligible bachelors that you are,"

"I don't think attention is what they're after," I said without thinking, flipping a coin to exercise my point.

"What do you mean?" Kine asked, looking at one of the brunnetes' pictures.

"Well dear brother," I said, flipping the coin again.

"Kado please don't start," father said, rather pleading with me.

"You see women are very intelligent creatures," for the most part

"Kado," my father sighed, his hand rubbing his temples.

"and they are geared to want two things, husbands to show off to their friends and money to have more things to buy than their friends," The look on Kine's face looked disgusted, fearful, but in a hysterical sort of way.

"that point of view is appallingly sexist." Kent argued, the app in his hands folding as he turned to face me.

"Kado, if there was a woman in the room I'd make you get your knees to apologize to her," Father agreed.

"Well that's ironic. I thought the getting on the knees was the woman's part," I'm sorry but he was just asking for it phrasing his sentence like that.

"One more word out of you and you won't come out of your room till your next birthday," I smirked, picking up another application randomly from the pile to try and keep my mouth shut.

"Are you kidding? He hates all this. That would be a gift," Perhaps Kent knew me better than I gave him credit for.

"Read. Analyze. I don't want the four of you out of this room till you can recite every girl's name and favorite piece of music by heart." Okay now he was just being ridiculous.

"I have some matters to tend to." the almost fully grey haired king looked back at me, nodding his head because we both knew of the "matters" he had to deal with.

The wars were getting worse and worse, father spending more and more time in his office and on the phone with generals and politicians. I tried not to think about it too much, but nonetheless I kept getting reminded that those would be my wars at some point.

"Hey Kado, look at this one. She has hair like you," Kine handed me an app, pointing to a girl with orange hair and a cute smile.

"Beatrix" I said aloud, placing my glasses down on my nose to read her file.

"No, no, she's a ginger. Kado isn't a ginger," Kent wagged his finger at his younger counterpart.

"He is too! Look at that mess on his head!" Kine pointed with both his hands in exclamation.

"No no no, his hair is red, red!" he said, putting emphasis as he tugged a pull fist of my hair to show him.

"You know as much as I'm enjoying this debate of yours, I'd rather you had it not within ear shot and not within grabbing distance," I said, grabbing Kent's hand off my head as they chuckled.

"It's just as well, she's too young for me anyway," I said, throwing the papers up at Kine's head as he caught it in front of his face.

"Here," Harry said, lightly, handing me an app I hadn't seen yet.

"She should be old enough for you," Harry was like mom more than with his softness. My mouth drew up, this time in a real, thankful smile.

"Thank you Harry,"

Pena. The temptress from the play.

"She's an orphan," Kent said over my shoulder, looking at her lack of last name.

"She's... really pretty" Kine said, staring at the picture.

"Eh, I mean they all are,"

"No they aren't!" In the background, Kent and Kine went back to arguing as I searched the girl for a moment.

19, blue eyed, tall like me. She was smiling, but barely, not like the other girls who were smiling so wide it gave up how fake most of them were. Yet in the same time, there was a hidden emotion lurking in the way her face tilted slightly away from the camera. She was eye-catching yes, refined in a european sense of beauty.

Pena.

Her name held a place on my tongue even without being spoken, I felt as though I'd said it before, long ago, in another life it seems.

Taking off my glasses, I look into her eyes once more, hoping to find something that leads me to the truth about her.

In them I cannot see a thing.

Perhaps father was right and it is right for us to get to know these women by heart. Already I can tell so much about Pena from just her picture.

The temptress from my play, the blue-eyed girl who could hide everything behind that barely perceptible smile.

* * *

The sun lights the sky so kindly, softly passing from cloud to cloud, reminding us of his presence in that subtle way. Every now and then I felt the need to look to the windows at the constantly changing light, taking it all in, fearful of what to come next.

I may have joked about the selection constantly, poking fun at the women and avoiding every opportunity to talk seriously of my interests in them. I left those opportunities for Harry and Kine, even Kent who showed slight hope that he might meet the love of his life, or at least a girl to make him happy. Those boys were in for a rude awakening.

All four of us stood by one another in the throne room, my father sitting in his crown behind us as we awaited the arrival of all thirty-five girls. The floors were always clean, but today the marble looked polished, new even, the smell acrid with bleach and perfumes that blinded the senses.

Matching the stringently grey and gold room, Kent stood beside me, his suit newly pressed, giving him a put together look for once. He chose not to wear his usual bluish, youthful colors. Perhaps threatened by being the second oldest, he tried to over compensate by dressing to old for his age.

On my other side, Kine wore simple black colors like me. The middle child had always been quite humble, a bit defensive, but humble nonetheless. Sometimes that betrayed him, people thinking him uncultured and unrefined like Kent.

"Relax, okay?" I urged Kine, watching him fidget with his hands as his eyes drifted to every corner of the room. I don't think I'd ever seen him even talk to a girl.

"Hm? I'm fine," he lied, exhaling so loudly Kent furrowed his brows competitively.

"Remind me what the age range is." Father asked us. I peaked back at him over my shoulder. He was reading some papers, themany short lines and code conversions telling me the codes from the dispatched armies had finally come in. I was eager to get at them, take some of the load off his back.

"15 to 20 years," Kent recited, a living textbook at times.  
"Hm and the regions?"

"All except the Barren and the far Eastern," jesus, shut up.

"Thirty seconds to live!" the media manager reminded us, directing the cameras, my brothers and I straightening at the sound.

"Deep breath boys," my father reminded, patting Kent on the back before disappearing into the crowd of camera operatives, directors, media managers, and everyone else in charge of making us presentable.

Harry smiled coyly, Kine's hands still fumbled, and Kent let his face become strictly monotone.  
Oh yeah, this was going to work alright.

Some announcements came onto the screen, reality news anchors showing beguiled joy in the coming moments. If father thought my hair was obnoxious he should've seen the silver rat's nest on that woman's head.

"And now," suddenly caught off guard, the name of a girl was spoken and the cameras spun to face us. I heard Kine's finally loud exhale and had to sigh myself.  
From whatever region she came, the doors opened to a single girl standing in the midst of an empty hall, a puffy dress of vibrant colors wrapping around her.

"Kasia Lionheart," the presenter's voice said with such grandeur, as if she was already a royal.  
The young girl's face had a nervous smile. Her darker skin gleamed in the light, bright brown eyes looking up at Harry as she curtsied before him.  
"Welcome Miss Lionheart," Harry said almost inaudibly and her smile widened at the sound of his voice.

"Welcome," Kine said, taking her hand and kissing her knuckle as she blushed.

"Thank you my prince," she squeaked, moving along to Kent who simply gave her a kind smile and a welcome to the palace my lady.

Then she got to me, looking up. She couldn't have been more than 5,4 or 5, at the very least a foot shorter than I was.  
"My prince," she curtsied to me.  
"It's an honor to meet you all," still she looked up at me, awaiting words to escape my lips. In her eyes, I didn't see anything malicious, but I could see right through her mousey exterior. Men find vulnerability and innocence appealing. That girl had been raised to find a husband. I remembered reading her file. It was impeccable, but seeing her in person I could see everything she wished to hide. She was manipulative and it showed in the way she moved. Already Harry seemed to be her target, her eyes tactfully meeting with his at every opportunity. At 16, it's hard not to be smitten with the first girl you meet who has the possibility to become yours.  
First husband hunter in my sights and I made a mental note to remember her.

So I said nothing.

Pleasing the cameras in the least, I gave her a single smile. When she extended her hand for me to kiss, I stared down at it and replied, "It's an honor indeed Miss Lionheart. Now we have other ladies to attend to,"

With that, she seemed offended, but soon played it off with a little laugh.  
"Right of course. It was a pleasure my princes. I hope to get to know all of you better," her eyes darted to Harry and I growled internally.

There's 34 others. He's bound to like one that isn't as transparent as her.

As the next girl walked down to us I couldn't help but think how much more efficiently this could be run. We could each meet 6 or 7 girls and be done with it. Or meet 4 at a time or something.

"Beatrix Hunting," The red or not red haired girl. Kine and Kent flicked each other behind my back annoyingly. Out of reflex, I reached back at both their wrists and pulled them down to their side, giving them each an authoritative frown.

And those idiots made me do it in front of the whole country after only two minutes of being on air.

"He started it-

"Shut up!" I whispered through gritted teeth.

"Hello my princes, it's an honor, truly. I am Beatrix, but most people call my Trixxy, but you can call me what you'd like of course," Oh great a chatty one. She curtsied.

"Hello Beatrix, I am Kent the second eldest, this Kine, Harry, and the eldest Kado." Trixxy batted her eyelashes so hard she could've blown out the candles. She smiled breathlessly, licking her lips to continue.  
"You don't look very much alike, but you're all very handsome- oh did I say that out loud I'm sorry, I can be so silly sometimes," It was a physical struggle not to roll my eyes.

"Haha, welcome Trixxy. Please make yourself at home we'll see you shortly." Kine took to this one, her charm lighting up his face.

As Trixxy shimmied her way to the women's parlor, I looked to Kent exasperated.

"How many more?"

"We've only seen two," he whispered, making me want to tear my hair out.

"I may kill myself tonight. Whoever finds my body please tell dad its his fault,"

"Don't joke like that when we're on tv please." Kent gently reminded me, knowing there was no microphones within ear shot. Although to think of it, my face probably gave away the disgust.  
"I'm not cut out for girls," I said, rubbing the back of my head.  
"Would 35 boys be more to liking?" Kent smirked.

"You'll pay for that comment little brother," He hated when I called him that.

"Shush all of you! You're ruining this!" Harry interjected, quieting us all. You know for the littlest brother he always seemed to be the one who was able to make us do things.

After thirty three girls had come and gone, I was sure my head would explode if i heard the phrase, "It's an honor to meet you" one more bloody time.

"Katherine June," A girl with olive skin and bright green eyes walked through the room, her hair a light brown matching her skin perfectly. Her face held a certain elegance, the bridge of her nose thin, her cheek bones lined with a v jaw.

"Good evening my princes," It's an honor to meet you all.

"You're much taller than you appear in the newscasts." hmm. Perhaps these girls weren't all determined to give me a migraine.

"We get that a lot," Kent chuckled. The girl's smile wasn't all be it annoying, actually seeming genuine. My only hope was that she wouldn't ruin it in the next thirty seconds.  
"I'm sorry i didn't mean to offend. You're all very handsome too if that helps," and there it was.

"Thank you Miss June," Harry voiced himself, feeling unnoticed.

"It's my pleasure. Thank you for inviting me into your home."

"It's a pleasure to have you here," Kine chimed in.

"Well, I like to think I can think I can give these girls some real competition. Let's hope I prove myself right," she winked, not even curtsying as she left the room.

"Finally," I sighed. Finally done.

"Hold your horses Kado,"

"Hm?"

"Well if you'd learned how to count," Kent grabbed my arm to pull me back up the step and into line.

"Pena of the Barren Isles," The announcer called.

I felt panic stir in me. All the sudden, i felt my mouth dry up and my blood tumble through my veins. Shooting my eyes to Kent in anger I practically growled at him, "you said there was no one from the Barrens."

Kent seemed just as surprised as me.

"That's what father told me. I had no idea." He promised, not understanding my anger.

Looking to the door, a woman stepped into the room from the hall. It took me a moment to focus on her, but when I did the panic in me only enticed.

Her eyes caught me, blue in the purest sense of the word, not a river or a crystal, but as cliche as it sounds an ocean. So bright in lures you in, yet so dark in the deep it seems impossible to see. As she got closer, I saw the flecks of darkness in her irises, like shipwrecks tarnishing the perfect sea.

Her skin was blemished in certain areas, covered in what seemed like rubs or rashes perhaps scars. I couldn't really decide whether it was tan or light, rather somewhere in between like the sun who couldn't decide if it was a bright day or not.

My eyes drew up her legs covered in pants rather than a dress. I remembered her almost empty file. A girl from the Barrens couldn't possibly have money for a dress.  
Her hair was a flaxen color like ripe hay, straightened and tied up in a ponytail reaching to her lower back.

What caught me the most was her face, how its familiarity seemed to bloom when she was standing right in front of me.

"Your majesties," she spoke with the slightest hint of an accent, her ts and os uneasily pronounced. She bowed like a boy uncultured in the ways of royals, her hair moving with her, two little untamed curls framing her face.  
"Hello Pena, welcome to-

"Are you really from the Barrens?" I interrupted Kent, knowing his welcome wasn't going to be short. And I wanted this thing to end as quickly as possible.  
Kent frowned up at me, not because I interrupted him, but because she was the first woman I even opened my mouth to.

"Yes, I grew up there." she answered, forgetting the "my prince" at the end of her sentence.

"Excuse my brother," Kent spoke for me.  
"It truly doesn't matter from where in Illea you are from-

"I would hardly call the Barrens part of Illea,"

"Kado." Kine tried to scold me.

The girl looked slightly up at me, tall herself, enough to be only a few inches shorter than I was. She did that thing I hated, a small smile that only curved the edges of her lips so I couldn't tell what she was thinking. With a laughy breath she responded to me, "A hundred years ago your ancestors didn't call the Barrens part of Illea either, may I remind you." Kent smiled at her, liking her knowledge the second he heard it.

"That is until they conquered it." there was such a defiance in her stare.

I stood there for a moment, taking in what she had said with a kind of shock in me. In the back of my head, I still tried to place her, the familiarity in her face driving me mad.

"I'm sorry, I'm being rude aren't I?" she said, bowing to my brothers as they introduced themselves.

She skipped over me, shaking Kine's hand as if it was what she was supposed to do.  
"It was nice to meet you Pena," Kent smiled down at her.

"I'm sorry I didn't have the proper attire as the other women," she excused herself, looking down at her clothing. Perhaps she wanted money like some of the others.

"It's alright, we'll provide whatever you need," Kent assured her.

"It was nice to meet you," she said, bowing her head one last time and placing her hands behind her back.

"Not an honor?" I asked, wanting to hear her voice again just to place her. It was going to drive me mad.

"I haven't decided yet," she smirked slightly, those hidden intentions peeking out the door before slamming them again.

"Like I said, it was nice to meet you all." she tried walking away, but I turned and called back to her, "Yes," catching her attention.

"Although I can't help but shake the feeling that we've met before," it wasn't until her ocean eyes stared into mine from over her shoulder that I clenched my fists, the panic spreading to every muscle in me.  
"No I'm sorry," she smiled that smile, turning around and walking away into the woman's parlor.

"If we had, I don't think I'd forget that hair,"

My panic receded as her footsteps became out of hearing distance.

Kine laughed hysterically as the cameras got off of us and onto our father for his thoughts on the ladies.

"Maybe she should wear your crown and she should get you the dress," He chuckled, my still clenched fist punching him lightly in the gut as he walked past me.

This girl didn't want a crown. Or at least that's not what I saw in her.

That's what frightened me.

I couldn't tell what she wanted.


	2. Chapter 2

**Btw you might see i have a lot of references to songs that are by billie eilish. I actually came up with this story listening to her songs, so just fyi i don't own any of the songs in this story or the selection or anything like that. cool. enjoy.**

I'm forgetful sometimes. I forget the most important things like teaching Harry how to play piano after he's asked me six times or to help father with his political matters that are buried somewhere in my desk. Sometimes it's hard to remember something you just need and want to recall.

In the same time, it's so difficult to forget something you so want out of your mind. I tended to write songs about things that troubled me, things I could never get out of my head. Would you be surprised if I told you none of them were about girls or heartbreak?

Yeah, me neither.

"What are you doing?" my father asked, from his desk, peeking over at me as I was supposed to be reading messages from the opposing armies. Quickly I hid my papers below the coding ones, frantically answering, "Sorry I got distracted,"

Oddly, he didn't seem angry.

"Mhm." more worried than anything.

"I'm ok dad," I assured, the stress of these wars starting to get to me. Twenty two years of being a king let him know how to read a person. Sadly I was more transparent than I thought.

"You know Kado, you're still just a kid-

"I'm 21 in a few weeks,"

"That's still a child from where I stand," I smiled, comfortable with him, even if for just a moment.

"Maybe you should go be with your brothers, relax a bit," I shook my head, marking the paperwork briskly in order to seem focused.

"I think I've had enough of them for today," As I brought my reading glasses back up my nose, I remembered how Kent always used to tell me they were too big for my head. I couldn't help but grin at the thought of him drawing big circles in ink on his face to match me when he was six.

"Can't stop talking about the girls can they?" Father shuffled through some papers, typing something into a coder to send to his secretaries.

"Yeah,"

"Well don't be too hard on them. You have no idea how excited I was the first day my selection." For some reason it was hard to imagine dad as a young man, waiting for the women to fill the room.

"Any of them interesting?" Interesting yes. Worth trying to find a queen in no.

"Kine likes Fawn and Beatrix I think. He kept staring at them when we crossed them in the hall," Father chuckled.

"Kine couldn't stop staring at that stallion he wanted," he reminded me.

"I don't think he rode him more once or twice,"

"Bad analogy dad," He sighed at my humour, but I knew it made him laugh, secretly under that beard.

"What about Harry and Kent?"  
"Harry's 16. He couldn't stop staring at all of them."

"Haha, yes well that is to be expected. Make sure he doesn't date any of the girls more than a year older. I wouldn't want them taking advantage."

"Way ahead of you," I still had that mental note in my head of all the girls I thought untrustworthy. Although that list was getting dangerously close to 35.

"Kent liked the smarter ones." I said, father now barely listening.

"Kent likes a challenge. He'll soon discover; a girl doesn't need an IQ of 135 to challenge him." He wasn't completely wrong. Kent liked a challenge. I wasn't sure how much he'd like the challenge of dating, not that I had much experience myself.

"What about you?" Oh no here it comes.

"I really don't want to talk about it,"

"Kado," He said, his voice lingering on the last syllable of my name like a soft warning.

"Dad," I replied, desperate.

His eyes were so annoyingly piercing, like two voids with the voice of god threatening to lock me in my room for the rest of my life.

"Fine!" I ceided.

"I don't like any of them. They're all either manipulative husband hunters, mousey dimwits, or foreign weirdos."

"What did we say about respect?"

"Is it really disrespectful if it's true?" He stared at me from above the line of his glasses.

"You promised me you'd try."

"Alright alright," I shook my head, desperate not to give in.

"The last one was… interesting." he seemed confused.

"The poor one?"

"Now who's being disrespectful?" he did not enjoy it when I talked back, so I continued, "Yes dad, the one from the Barrens."

"Ah, the orphan. What was her name again? Terra? Patricia?"

"Pena." I corrected, the image of her rebelling chin tilted upward at me suddenly poking itself into my head. Those annoyingly eye-catching eyes that seemed to enjoy challenging my own. And that smile, that dumbing smile I couldn't stop thinking about. Her voice, that tone of such defiance, like she wanted to test how far she could go past the boundary line.

"Interesting is a start." Father was having a conversation with himself as far as I was concerned.

"I never said interesting in a good way,"

"Kado, you're going to have to make an effort. Pick one of the girls to go on a date with."

"Why do you enjoy torturing me?"

"Are you sure you aren't gay?"

"Of course I'm not gay!" I yelled, standing up in frustration.

"There's a war going on! Everyday I'm afraid that we might get shot at if we show our faces outside the castle. I find myself telling Harry not to go to the gardens anymore because I'm afraid of him being out in the open on his own. People are getting massacred in our own backyard. Our soldiers are dying somewhere past the Barrens where we can't send help anymore. Dad I understand why you're making this happen now and why you think this will make Kent and Harry and Kine happy- and it will… but I'm not ready for this. Life is already so complicated as it is. We just lost mom a year ago dad. I have to take care of an entire kingdom with you, an entire war with you. And I have to protect my brothers from both of them. I can't find myself falling in love with a girl and having to lock her inside because I'm afraid she'll be shot at or kidnapped. I just need time before I even think about a queen."

The king nodded his head slowly at me, sitting back in his chair, his glasses thrown onto the desk before him. Sighing, he ran his hands through his hair back and forth and looked up at me, his lips folding one another.

"I miss mom," I admitted, watching him pour himself a glass of whiskey.

"I miss her too son," He grabbed another glass.

"I know you're not quite 21 just yet," the brown liquid poured into the bottom ⅛ of the glass.

"But I think we both need one of these tonight," Handing me the glass, we clinked, shooting down the burning liquid hoping it would soothe the worries in our minds.

"You know I knew your mother was going to marry me the moment I met her," My almost soothed stress was replaced with a certain nostalgia as I heard him.

"How?" I asked.

"You know how girls that age can be; all coquettish, girlie, and sometimes well just textbook swooning." Where was he when we were meeting our selected. I nodded.

"Your mother had this gentle air, kindness, genuine kindness in her soul." She had it with me too.

"She didn't tell me how handsome I looked or how beautiful everything was." His eyes were dreamy, as if he was picturing her standing in the room with us.

"She told me how rude I was being to the servants and how we ought to have more parties to cheer everyone up." he laughed.

"Your mother may have been beautiful Kado, but above all she was just…" he stopped, exhaling, maybe remembering she was gone.

"Perfect?" I asked. He shook his head.

"No. she was perfect for me,"

I never connected with my dad, not really.

He was a pushy, demanding, rude king, always so focused on how we reflected him and how his kingdom would perceive him…

But at the end of the day, when we really talked- for real. Well, it might've been the whiskey, but things didn't seem so bad afterall.

* * *

"Who are you going to ask out first?" little brother asked me at the breakfast table which I was now forced to attend.

"There are more things to worry about in this world than dates Kine," he rolled his eyes, trying to read the papers I was sorting through. Without my glasses it was awfully tough to read through, but I'd rather be photographed dead than with my big round reading glasses.

"What about you?" I asked, trying to avoid making him feel rejected.

"I don't know yet," he said, looking across the sea of girls at our breakfast table. Most of them were much more subtly dressed today.

"You seemed to like the redhead," I reminded him, looking to find her in the crowd.  
"Trixxy?"

"Mhm,"

"She's cute," He admitted, looking over at her as she caught his gaze and smiled lightly.

"And my age too," He smiled and waved subtly at her. Trixxy placed her hand on her mouth and giggled, waving back and coyly turning to talk to the other women.

"Ask her out today. Father is eager to have us in front of the cameras talking to these girls and she seems pretty eager to meet you,"

"You're right," he said, silently planning as he stuffed his face with a piece of waffle inelegantly. I shook my head at him in humoured embarrassment.

"What about you?" he asked, his voice muffled.

"What about me?"

"You know, you're not as good at hiding things as you think you are," He said, swallowing.

"You may not like any of them yet," I barely tolerated any of them.

"But you're curious." since when was Kine observant.

"I can tell when something is on your mind."

"Yeah," I agreed.

"A war. That and handling you three are the only things on my mind." I whacked his head with my pen, and he swatted me away.

"Oh don't play that card Kado. It's a desperate attempt to dodge my question and you know it," He accused and it was getting harder and harder to ignore him.

"I've known and lived with you for seventeen lonnng years brother." I put all of the papers done, getting them together and placing them down in front of me as I drew my plate in. I only momentarily considered throwing my breakfast in his face.

"I can tell when your distracted," With that he wiped his mouth and stood, patting my back as he walked (almost skipping) over to the girls.

Out of an anxious boy from the day before, there was now a big flirt ready to charm his way into that group of girls. As he got to their side of the breakfast table, all of the girls smiled, the excitement of opportunity lighting them up like christmas trees.

"Great," I said to myself, my eyes absentmindedly drawing over the women. At the end of the table, I stopped. The only the girl who's head wasn't up and staring at my brother attentively. No instead her eyes were fixed on the windows as she watched the sun draw in and out of the clouds.

Pena. The temptress from my play. It was actually a devil as I looked through the book the night before.

"A devil comes disguised as a beautiful woman: Pena." it read, and ever since then I couldn't help but think of the irony. How a beautiful girl had come to the castle from a place where no one lurks. how her radiant eyes caught the light in such a way that you couldn't help but stare at them endlessly. How unschooled she was in the ways of royals. How she had not an ounce of nervous mannerisms, a confidence she shouldn't have in the face of the four second most powerful men in the country. How she walked in such a way that bled entitlement.

Father used to say you had to walk into every room as if you owned it, because, well we did, but I could never pull it off like she had.

When her eyes drew away from the windows to face the world, they met mine, and suddenly I realized I'd been staring at her all this time. Embarrassed slightly, I threw my eyes down to my half empty plate, desperate to avoid looking into those oceans she called eyes.

Perhaps she would think I was only scanning the room, but already I could tell she wasn't that imperceptive.

Still, I had to look, peaking up with my face still tilted down to the table.

As I did, I noticed she still wasn't wearing a proper attire again. She sat outfitted in some sort of denim jeans and a white sweater who's neck looked outstretched, a black leathered band of a necklace around her neck. A silver pendant hung from it, although she was too far away for me to see exactly what it hair was still tied back in that neat ponytail hanging all the way down to the sides of her hips.

Her eyes met mine again, and she leaned back, pushing her empty plate forward. That challenging look she gave me, like she was above me even, it only enticed me. How could she look at me that way, not knowing whether I'd kick her out for it.

Practically silent, Pena pushed her chair back, placing her hand on Katherine's shoulder and whispering something in her ear before standing to leave. Katherine smiles up at her, nodding. I didn't know any of the women could have gotten so cozy already. It seemed the devil was good at making friends after all.

As she walked around the table, proceeding to the hall, her eyes drew back to me again.

And then, as luck would have it, that stupid fricken smile showed itself again, as if she was laughing to herself.

A single maiden rolling in a cart of more food interrupted her stride.

"I'm sorry miss, was your breakfast not satisfactory?" She asked genuinely.

Pena's smile retreated, replaced by a genuine one.

"It was wonderful actually. I don't think I've ever had better." The young maiden blushed and let her chin fall downward with a shy nod.

Pena reached behind her, grabbing a piece of buttered toast and taking a bite into it. Chewing she looked at me again, maybe not understanding why I was still looking at her.

As she went to leave the hall, she stopped right above me, not looking down as she whispered, "you know, you have my picture. If you like staring so much, I suggest you refer to that instead of well." She paused, tilting her face down. I wasn't facing her, but I could just tell.

"Embarrassing yourself,"

Did she just?

I couldn't help but look back at her over my shoulder then, that smug smile on her lips and overconfident look on her face too much to bear.

She strut out of the room, her ponytail swaying back and forth along her back.

For a second, I considered staying seated, giving her the satisfaction of having the last word. It would show I was the bigger man, capable of not being insulted by a girl who didn't know when to shut her mouth. But as you probably figured out by now I'm an idiot.

"Fuck it." I whispered to myself, pushing my chair back and throwing the napkin onto the table.

"Kado?" Kine questioned, seeing how displeased I looked as I walked past him and the bevy of giggly girls.

Finally in the empty hall, I caught sight of her backside.

She seemed confused, her steps slowing as she looked to her left and right, not exactly knowing where she was.

Suddenly feeling the ability to be smug myself, I stopped behind her

"Lost?"

She jumped, spinning around to face me her cheeks reddening when she realized how close I'd gotten.

"Oh I'm sorry," I chuckled.

"Didn't mean to _embarrass_ you," She looked up with an annoyed glare, rolling those eyes at me.

She wore natural colors, the fabrics unsupple. It was the only sign of humility on her.

"Can I help you?" She asked, making me want to teach her how she should address her higher ups.

"You don't have much experience with royals do you?" She snorted at me.

"You think because I choose not to get on my knees nor act the grateful idiot I have never been in the company of a King?"

"Funny that you think it's a choice." I corrected, knowing she was only trying to have her fun with me. She did not like that comment, for once that mysterious devil's face showed me how she really felt; insulted.

"You're supposed to say, your majesty, your grace, or my prince when you address me." I reminded.

" ah but you see you are not mine oh dear and wonderful ruler, so I cannot dream of calling you 'my prince'" she mocked

"And sadly I find you neither majestic nor graceful Kado." I'd never heard her say my name before or any commoner for that matter.

"Do you know what could happen to you if my father heard you talk that way to me?" She smiled again, that smile that was starting to become infuriating.

"Do you always rely on your father to fight your battles?"

I was wrong. She wasn't a devil disguised as a beautiful woman. She was just a bitch.

"Let me make something clear Barren." Addressing her by the disgusting place she came from made her furrow her brows at me. It had the effect I was hoping for.

I took a step forward and she took a step back.

"You are here as long as _I_ allow it." Another step forward met by another step backwards.

"Say something like that again," She kept backing away, my tone beginning to frighten her.

"And you'll be finding yourself someplace much worse than where you came from." Her breath hitched as she hit the wall behind her, her hands against the white in a defensive form.

Looking up at me, the sea in her eyes was fighting through a hurricane, the anger in her passing through the fear.

I couldn't believe I let myself be so affected by her words for a moment. People had said worse to me and I'd only just met her. Finally able to make words again she stared back at me, her defiance intact.

"You used to say worse to me you know?" She said, holding the silver pendant on her necklace tightly in her fist. For a moment it seemed she was listening for something, not me, but rather a voice in her head.

"What?" I asked, questioning her sanity.

She laughed, throwing her head back against the wall, exposing her sharp little jaw and the lines of her neck.

"You really don't remember me, do you?" She said again.

"Has it really been so long? Or have I just changed that much?" Pena. Pena. Pena. The name meant something to me I knew it and more than from just a play. That face that smile, those eyes. I'd seen them all before I knew it I just couldn't place it. It drove me to hell, trying to remember, trying to see where I'd met her before.

"No need to look so worried," she placed a hand on my cheek.

"My Prince," she added in, the warmth of her fingers against my skin inviting me into her touch.

"We all forget where we come from sometimes,"

Defensively, I pulled my face away and grabbed her wrist tightly, so much so that she gasped at the feel of restraint.

I pulled her arm up so that she was almost against me, those blue diamonds shimmering in the daylight. She wasn't fearful despite my harshness. In the moment, my jaw locked and unlocked as I grit my teeth.

The panic I remembered on the day of meeting her came back to me and for some reason my body was so determined to keep it away I did things the sane me wouldn't even think of.

"I meant no offense Prince Kado," she whispered, her lips inches away from mine.

"But if you wouldn't mind letting go of my arm." Coming back to a state of reality, I realized what I was doing and dropped her, turning around, ashamed to face her.

"I'm sorry Lady Pena. I don't know what I was-

"It's fine." She said not completely upset as she rubbed her wrist which now had a red mark on it.

"I shouldn't have put so much on you all at once," with that she smiled and seemed to find her way again.

"Hey!" I called to her.

"Meet me at the garden tonight at 11. I have a feeling we have things to talk about."

* * *

She was late.

11:12 and still no sign of her.

I paced back and forth in the gardens, admiring the night sky above head. Waiting, waiting, waiting.

I sent the guards away, the order reluctantly followed. Still, I wanted to be alone with her, I had to be alone with her. I couldn't let her distract me anymore. The war was too important. I couldn't deal with my brothers, my father, the fricken armies, the selection, _and_ this stupid girl. This had to stop now. It had been less than 24 hours and already I was being driven insane by a woman who wasn't even my girlfriend.

That night at dinner, father made me sit between two of the selected, Fawn and another one whose name I couldn't remember. All throughout all I could think about was the dispatch heading out in the morning and the calculations for cost of weapons I had to make. Well that and where the fuck I knew Pena from. I swear to god if I knew her from a single childhood event where we had a two words conversation I was going to shoot my brains out.

She wasn't wrong when she said I was embarrassing myself staring at her. At dinner she finally decided to wear something appropriate and chose dress pants along with a blouse I was sure belonged to Katherine. It was a little low cut for my taste and I caught Kent staring at her where he wasn't supposed to once or twice, but still none of them talked to her. They thought I liked her.

"Are you alright?" I spun around, my fingers tugging at the hair behind my neck as I tapped my foot frantically.

"No." Pena tilted her head to one side like a confused puppy, her hair finally down and framing her face. The locks had begun curling slightly, the true nature of her strands coming alive at night. It fit her quite nicely actually. It was less for lack of a better word, conserved and collected than her original ponytail.

"I'm sorry about earlier," she said.

"I shouldn't have tried to antagonize you so much. I just thought, you were so displeased with me within the first few minutes of my arrival that…" her sentence faded and she brought her gaze to the rosebush beside a stone bench. As she went to sit, I finally got to see the shape of her. The nightgown she wore wrapped around her hips tightly, slipping down to her ankles with a slit reaching up her thigh. It was tasteful despite its size, the light blue matching her bright eyes. Her tall, thin stature paired with the curve of her hips and muscle that lined her legs. She was built like a runner, yet her arms and neck seemed delicate like a rider's.

"No." I said, trying not to keep staring at her body like that.

" _I_ apologize. It was rude of me to dismiss you so quickly," she licked her pouty lips and looked up at me through her lashes.

"I would've dismissed myself to be honest," she laughed.

"Not exactly the best girl to be seen with. You the one who dared to wear pants to meet the country's rulers." she joked. I couldn't help but give a humoured breath.

Nervously she grabbed the edge of the bench with each of her bony fingers, rocking back and forth on her heels as she didn't know what to say next.

Her hand.

I remembered how they it that afternoon, pressed up lightly against my cheek as she mocked me. Despite the situation, I remembered the touch more than anything. It was comfortable, intimate regardless of its sarcastic nature. Her skin had a warmth I recognized, as did those eyes paired with it.

"I know you," I said, breaking the silence.

"And you know me," She nodded, biting her lower lip ashamed.

"I didn't think you'd remember," she whispered, letting go of the stoney edges and rubbing her hands together in the cold.

I sat down next to her.

"I don't- I mean I do! But I just can't," for some reason the thought couldn't escape me. She gave me a sympathetic grin.

"Ya I know." My head dropped and I groaned, my hand tugging at my hair again (a nervous habit)

"I barely remember until my dad reminds me that we used to play together." I want her to keep talking, drive herself out of my head for good.

"We did?" I asked.

"Mhm. Your mother brought you. She needed my father's help and well, I was always there too." I thought back to a time when mom was alive, when I was young and she brought me into the city. I couldn't quite remember that part, but Pena's face did look so familiar, especially when I thought of a rounder, younger face not so grown up. And those curls, I knew those curls too.  
"I wasn't lying you know," she smiled to herself.

"Could never forget that hair," she pointed at the mess on my head, making me self conscious. I patted down the puff in an attempt to make her stop laughing at me like that. I have to give her credit though. It was quite a nice laugh; not mousey or giggly or fake, just a laugh that thinned her eyes and reddened her cheeks.

Real.

"You're one to talk," I said, referring to the now even frizzier locks climbing up her body. Pouting up at her hair and back at me, I rolled my eyes at her attempt to get an apology out of me.

"At least I couldn't get a job as a circus clown." she smirked a little too smuggishly for me.

"Well maybe not a clown" I raised a finger.

"But I hear the circus business is always looking for freaks who can shove a hundred pieces of toast down their throat in a minute," her jaw dropped and rose back up as she sneered.

"Learn how to count clown head. It was 87." she winked at me as I chuckled.

"Now I think I remember." I said, a hopeful gleam lighting her eyes.

"Do you remember that you called me simpleton?" she asked. Yeah that sounded like me.

"Haha, no but I do now." She pushed my arm playfully, laying an elbow on her knee and placing her face gently on a closed fist.

"Didn't you call me…" i paused trying to phrase it right.

"Connard?"

"Cõnnāŕ" she corrected, that accent of hers so sweet to the senses.

"Connar." I repeated, butchering it still.

"That's beautiful."

"You think so?" She asked, still not facing me.

"Yes."

"Good."

"What does it mean?"

"Asshat." She said, her lips thinning into a single line as she tried to stop herself from bursting into laughter.

"Oh yes very funny," I teased as she fell over herself her hand over her mouth as she convulsed. I watched her then, only for a moment. Pena. The devil from my play. I was wrong again. She wasn't a devil. She was just a girl I'd forgotten once.

"Don't do that," I said absentmindedly. She looked confused.

"Hm?" I grabbed her hand, bringing my arm across her slowly and placing it down on her knee.

"Don't cover your mouth when you laugh." she furrowed her brows.

"Oh dear. Am I breaking yet another royal rule? Do you want to check my teeth?" She bared them, a silly girl in the night.

"Haha, no," I said, watching her receide, smiling that unbearable smile that made me crumble.

"But its nice to see you laughing,"

Did I just?  
"Thanks," she took it lightly, as if I was her friend- well actually, apparently I had been.

"Why are you here?" the question shot out of me to change the tone. The conversation had changed in a way I wished it hadn't (and by own doing none the least). I had to watch out for that.

"Oh," she said.

"So I guess you've figured out by now that I'm not exactly here to in your father's words, 'win over your heart'" She put her hand on her chest, mocking him with a fake pride on her face.

"Yes, yes." I sighed and she chuckled.  
"Ok well, since you don't seem to be interested in this selection either, can you promise to keep this between us, at least until your brothers agree to eliminate me?" I'd never actually made a promise before. No one had ever asked that of me before. It felt strange, but somehow I knew this promise was worth making.  
"Mhm," I nodded.

"I come from a place where I don't really, you know, fit in that well. And a lot of the time, I'm not even welcome in the place I was raised. So, my dad and brother thought it was best I try this you know? Get a chance to find a place where I do fit in." Her ocean eyes waved calm water through her irises, those dark blue flares of shipwrecks buried in stillness.

She was vulnerable.

"Little did I know how hard it would be to fit when I don't even want the same thing as all the other girls here-

"What do you want?" I interrupted her thought.

"What?"

"You heard me. If you don't want what all the other girls do, then what is it you want exactly?" Her vulnerability hid away at my push. She gripped her pendant that hung around her neck for a moment, breathing unevenly, thinking, listening, waiting for me to speak again.

"What about you?" She deflected.

"What is it you want?" I shrugged, locking my jaw back and forth.

"I want this war to end." I admitted. No harm could come from me telling her the truth.

"I want my brothers to be safe and to choose girls who won't want them for just the crowns on their heads and the money in their pockets." She listened attentively, authentically.

"I want my dad to understand that I can't handle everything all at once. I can't handle 35 girls, 50 army dispatches, 3 opposing sides, 17 allied countries, and 3 brothers." There was a moment of silence as I let go of a breath I thought I'd been holding in way too long.

"What if I told you I wanted the same thing." I turned to face her and she continued.

"What if I told you I wanted this war to end so I could go home, that I wanted to keep my family safe too, that I wanted to them to understand I'm not cut out for this." I swallowed.

"Then I guess I'd say we'd make a pretty good team." Her mind spun in circles, I could see it in the way she bit her bottom lip. Standing, she wrapped her arms around herself in a shiver and grabbed a white rose from the bush.

"Oh, here." I said, taking off my blazer to put on her shoulders. The gesture seemed less romantic in my head. With the rose in her hand she gripped the sleeves of the blazer and slid her own arms into it, thanking me with her little smile that I hated so.

"Let's make a deal," she said, holding the rose out in front of her.

"You let me stay here till the final candidates, till the war starts to die down in the Barrens. And if you let me stay, I promise I'll do everything to make your father believe you're actually participating in this. I'll even ask Katherine to go on a fake date with you to make it seem like you're weighing your options."

It was tempting. The thought of never having to actually participate while being able to focus on all the tasks I had to get to. I'd never have to talk to any of the mousey girls or get involved with my brothers. I could say Pena and I were going to the movies when really we just both sat in a room while I worked and she did, well, whatever she wanted.  
"My dad's not an idiot." I said.

"If he thinks anythings up you'll be gone." Pena, looked down at the rose, one of her fingers pricked by a thorn.

"Then we'll just have to convince him." She raised the rose to me and I grabbed at it tightly, the striking end piercing my skin.

Her hand outreached to shake my own and I joined in.

"Deal."

"Deal."


	3. Chapter 3

"You have to start wearing dresses,"

Pena and I were walking on the track inside the athletics section of the castle, empty and free of guards or servants. I always tried waking up as early as I could. Sleep was a waste of time when I had to deal with everything. Somehow, she was up before me, wanting to run to destress or something.

"That's not very convenient for track now is it?" she said, the straightness of her hair restored, the silky yellow pony tail back in its place.

"Be serious. The people like you because you're not catty, you're pretty, and so far you're not completely unbearable. But you have to dress the part and that means you know, ladylike clothing and jewelry and stuff like that. Things a princess would wear." She pursed her lips and rolled her eyes. That was really getting old.

"Aw you really think I'm pretty Kade?" she mocked. I glared down at her as we turned the corner.

"Don't call me that,"

"Would you prefer I call you Cõnnāŕ?" Oh that smugness.

"Relaaaxx your majesty. I'll wear your dresses if you lend them to me, ok?" Begrudgingly, I just accepted her talking that way to me.

To be honest, Kine has always talk to me that way too, disrespectful or not. But he had a semiright as a prince. She had neither the right nor the affordance.

"So why do you wake up so early?" She asked, swinging her arms forward and back with her steps.

"Habit I guess. When I have a lot of work I usually get up early to catch up."

"So why are you here with me?"

"I wanted to make the boundaries and ramifications of our deal clear to you, see if you had anything to clear with me."

"You make it sound like we're two countries getting ready to sign a peace treaty,"

"Isn't that exactly what this is?" I asked, coming to a stop.

"A peace treaty between u and I?" She turned to face me.

"It's more a…" she thought it over

"symbiotic relationship, a partnership if you will," For a barren she sure knew how to talk.

"Alright." I agreed.

"An alliance." I finalized continuing forward with Pena at my side.

"You really are politically minded." She wasn't completely wrong.

"Just how I was raised you know?"

She thought it over, her gaze loosely fixed on the ground of red and white path. The smell of rubber was quite potent, the room freshly cleaned just the night before.

"Sometimes I feel like it's a lot to handle; a war that's my responsibility to end. And now it's worse than ever. Our own people are unhappy, we have more and more casualties. 4 of the opposing sides are starting to encroach on the Eastern region." I let myself go away with my thoughts, no longer remembering who I was talking to.

"We're just— we're not losing, but we're far from winning. Illea has always been on unsteady terrain when it comes to Its allies and we're barely clinging to the ones we have left. Sometimes I wish I could tell my dad that I need more time, more resources, more individual focus to be what he wants me to be."

She took my hand for a moment, bringing me back down to earth.

She held it out in front of her. Feeling unthreatened, I let her take it in that gentle outreach. Her palms were soft, delicate even, the bridge of her knuckles sliding over mine as she reached to her ear. Removing her little silver earrings, she placed them in the pit of my hand, closing my fist over them and letting it go.

"I understand how hard that can be," she said.

"Being shapes your whole life to be something you don't think you can be." She reached down to tie her sneakers tighter on her feet.

"But hey," she put her hand on my shoulder.

"At least you have a castle right?" She lept off her feet, jogging out in front of me. She'd done that a few times,finishing a lap and stopping to walk next to me earlier.

I sighed, her attitude as entertaining as it was, embittering. She always made me think we were getting somewhere and then… well, not.

She jogged forward, the pony swinging with the movement of her legs. Her black leggings looked new, the slight shine in their design definitely something she borrowed from the palace.

She wore this tight little tank top that stopped right at the edge of her ribs, tight around her torso. The ensemble made her look even taller than usual, those big eyes keeping her youthful air intact. She turned the corner behind me and almost caught up before she ran right past me.

Was she trying to get me to run with her?

She looked back at me, running backwards for a second, before winking and continuing down the track.

"Catch up Kade!"

God she was aggravating.  
The goal to get her out of my head so I could focus didn't work out so well the night before...but I mean at least she was useful for something now.

"Think you're cool?" I called, before she yelled back, "Yup!"

Another lap, and she passed me again, blowing a kiss before yelling, "Are you always this slow my prince?"

Another lap.

"Come on Kade, don't let me have all the fun here."

Ok that's enough.

As she tried to pass me, I grabbed at her waist with both my hands and lifted her up.

"Hey!" she yelled, grabbing at my hands, and kicking one of her legs out.

I grunted,putting her down to face me. As she went to say something rude with her pouty lips I grabbed her wrists. They were bony little things, her skin warm against my palms. She was sweating the slightest bit, trying to wriggle out of my grasp. Finally she submitted, her chest rising and falling as her pulse quickened below my touch. I couldn't tell if it was because we were so close together or because she had overexerted herself.

"Rule number 1 of this deal Pena," I said, her eyes watching mine attentively.  
"You listen to me. Whatever I say goes. So when I say not to call me that, you don't call me that, especially not in front of anyone." she nodded.

"Fine, fine, let me go you brute."I dropped her down, watching her recompose herself. She was actually quite cute all flustered.

"I swear to god you're gonna sprain my wrists one day." she said, looking at the red mark that lingered from the afternoon before.

"Should I kiss it and make it better?" Oh yes. I could play her little games too.

Her eyes darted up at mine, a surprised gaze with underlined indignation. She knew I was teasing her, yet there

Placing gentle hands back at her sides, Pena tilted her head to the side, exposing her neck.

"Careful Kado." she warned playfully.

"Our deal doesn't include as much as you may think it does."

"I don't remember you saying that when we were kids. Come to think of it, I think I remember you kissing me once or twice." Her jaw dropped, that crinkle between her eyebrows rousing a smile in me.

"I was four. I didn't know what kissing was."

"I was six. I think you just assaulted me." The more I remembered about her, the more I remembered my mom dropping me off in this little backyard telling me to be nice to the little girl with puffy yellow hair.

"Oh Kado." she clicked her tongue.

"If I assaulted you, you'd know it." her arms crossed over her chest and she raised a single challenging eyebrow.

"Rule number two." she said authoritatively.

"No sex."

What the-

"Excuse me?"

"I'll do whatever you need me to do to convince your father and the cameras, but ever lay a hand on me without my consent and you'll lose the hand."

36 hours. I'd known her for 36 hours and already she was threatening me.

"Who says I want to touch you?"

"It hasn't been two days and you've already grabbed me more times than I can count."

"That wasn't- I wasn't-

"Rule number three." she said, making me wish I'd just let her keep running.

"I like chocolate. Not flowers." She winked.

"Isn't that a bit presumptuous?"

She shook her head no.

"If you're father's going to think you're interested in me you have to make it seem like you care what I think of you. Generally girls like boys who give them chocolate or flowers. I like food." She smiled.

"And rule number 4." Her arms eased down to her side, that stern expression gone from her.

"If you're overwhelmed— really overwhelmed by the war or your father or anything else," her defensive stance relaxed as she spoke.

"Then you come to me." I didn't follow. What would she get out that?

"Why would I come to you?" Her eyes shut, the ghostly smile on her lips.

"Well all need someone who understands what we're going through,"

For the first time since actually meeting her, in meeting anyone actually, I found something I'd only ever seen in Harry.

Kindness.

* * *

The next day came about in a rush. After my run with Pena, things seemed to slow down. Father allowed me to ride in the forests like I did a few times a month on my own. There was just something about the serenity of the forest that drew me to her, the remainder of my mother's soul lost in her winds and oaky air. I spent so long there, just trying to exist, I hadn't realized how late it'd gotten.

Coming home, my father intercepted me in the hall. With droopy eyes and worn out lines on his forehead, he welcomed me home with an embrace I hadn't expected.

"Thank you Kado, truly." He said, letting me go as I awkwardly stared back at him.

"You're welcome? Did you see my proposal for the Eastern Region's tactics?" I felt my heart jump. Finally he began noticing that I wasn't failing at every task he gave me. Finally I'd done something useful for him and my country.

"Oh that? No, no, I was talking about this." He held out a newspaper with a black and white fuzzy picture on the cover.

"Given your reluctance in this entire process I didn't think you'd come around, but as always you came through." He patted me on the back as I began reading the article.

"I have to go. I have a late meeting, but keep up the good work alright? Maybe go out with one of the other girls too you know just to keep up moral along the girls too old for your brothers, ok?" My heart sunk back from where it came.

A picture of me and Pena standing in the garden in the late night was on the cover. The darkness obscured the image a tad, but you could see the shape of my jacket on her shoulders. You could see the way I looked down at her, how the blue of her eyes caught me so enthralling. I remembered that moment we shared; when she told me that we could help one another as we had when we were kids.

"Fucking hell," grabbing at the scurf of hair at the back on my neck, my other fist crumpled the paper.

It'd taken me months working on that proposal. The selection had been going on two days and my father was already starting to overlook all my contributions to the war. Maybe this was how the women felt when it was time for them to marry.

The ire lingered in me throughout the night.

Sleepless, I laid in my bed above the covers, thinking about the last 24 hours.

2 attacks, 16 miles of farmland burned to a crisp, and 13 casualties in 24 hours. The numbers played over and over in my head. I'd known one of the soldiers who died in the fire.

His name was Edmund. I remembered meeting him when he assisted Colonel Burke in preparations for the Barren hold outs two months ago. I'd spoken to him after the meeting about what his thoughts were on the conditions army men were exposed to. I remembered his smile and how he told me that the conditions were as favorable as they were ever going to be. "A war against an enemy like this, we have to be grateful for anything we can find." He'd said. I remembered how his newly wed bride had come to the castle with him, holding a baby in her arms.

That woman was a widow now, her child destined to grow up never having known his own father. Somehow... Knowing that was worse than any number of death's recorded on a sheet of paper.

Breaking into a sweat of anxious energy, I hurled myself out of bed and rushed to the desk covered in an endless stack of paperwork I'd been working on for what seemed. Staring down at it all, I only saw my failures; all the decisions I'd made shot down by the king, all the proposals and plans I'd ever put my heart and soul into that he threw away.

I couldn't take it any longer.

Fuck this attacks. Fuck this war. Fuck my plans, Fuck the armies, Fuck my father, Fuck. Every. Fucking. Thing. In this fucking world.

Fuck the world for all it'd done. Fuck it for deciding that seven countries needed to shed more blood than ever before in history. Fuck it for taking so many sons and daughters. Fuck it for killing the prosperity so many deserved. Fuck it for sucking the life out everything I loved. Fuck it for taking my mother when I needed her most. Fuck it for hurting my brothers

Suddenly

, I was out of breath, my heart racing against my lungs. My hands shook and when I looked down they were red, covered in smudges of blood and cuts.

My desk looked like it'd been ransacked, the papers once neatly organized all over the floor, torn up as if by a rabid animal.

I had to calm down, I had to recollect myself, I had to just-

...

A deep breath made its way into my throat and I let it go slowly, counting the seconds, not the beats that pounded in my temples. The darkness carresed my trembling skin, enveloping it in a kindness to calm my heart. Through the open doors of the balcony, the wind gently blew through my drapes. As it reached through my hair and over my face, I heard the gentle voice carried in the breeze of a woman I once knew.

"Breath." It said, a goddess' voice.

And so I did.

When the rush of anger or anxiety or whatever it was in me had subsided, I looked down at the mess of a desk that I had ruined. Slumping back into the desk chair, defeated, I started picking up the papers on the ground one by one. Within a few minutes, all the papers were neatly put in the trash can near the door, never to be seen again.

Picking an untarnished, uncrumpled piece of white paper from the depths of a drawer, I began writing. My pen flew across the page as I wrote the words that demanded to escape my mind.

Anxious, ire filled phrases filled the paper, equally angry music notes above them.

When the sun began rising, I was still at the desk, a new stack of wildness spread about the table.

And for once, I was proud of it.


	4. Chapter 4

**Pena POV**

I don't think I'd ever forget that shade of red.

Bloody, gruesome, obnoxiously red. Kado.

Kado; the asinine little prick of a prince who'd come over and 'play' with me when we were young.

He'd grown tall, towering above his brothers in the throne room I'd reluctantly entered. Walking in without any idea of what to expect, my eyes fixed themselves low and to the ground.

Maybe it wasn't very dignified, but it was easier than staring directly at them.

"Make sure you act like normal people do. Always seem interested in what they have to say. Use your beauty to your advantage. Get their attention just enough that they let you stay, but not so much that you stand out." Father's voice resonated in my head as I made my lengthened strides less nervous and small looking.

Calm. Calm. Calm. Calm. I repeated to myself, letting father's voice dissipate, replaced by my own confidence.

Finally able to regain pride in myself despite my image, I caught their eyes.

The smaller blue haired boy, smiled kindly, innocently, the brown haired one next to him more serious looking. All four brothers looked so different, yet so similar with the shape of their defined faces. The second youngest stood at the other end, his hands fidgeting restlessly at his sides. His hair was dark, standing out from his family.

Although if we're talking about standing out...

Kado's intense stare was fixed onto me, making the little pride I'd manage to muster retreat coyly into a corner. He was so much bigger than I remembered. I was tall myself, standing evenly with most men, but not Kado. I had to tilt my head to see those piercing brown eyes void of any warmth.

He was quite rude I might add, barely remembering who I was, grabbing my wrists senselessly whenever I had displeased him, losing his patience at the slightest hum ours comment from me. But I would be lying if I said it wasn't fun to see him so reactive to all I did.

Father said he'd kick me out if I teased him too much, but so far I was safe.

The other girls were kind women, one of them a bit standoffish like me.

Katherine was quite a beautiful girl, the body of a model and the face of one too. Despite her advantage, she didn't seem that interested in the princes. I had yet to figure out what she wanted, but at least she was kind to me.

"You slut!" she yelled walking into my room and catching me out of a trans. Startled, the book I was reading fell out of my hands as I jumped. I panicked until I saw the big smile on her face. Her light brunette strands were tied back in a pony, a style I favored as well. She seemed, giddy, holding a newspaper in her overly long nails.

"Pardon?" I asked, bending down to pick up my novel.

"You seriously weren't going to tell me you went on a date on the first day of the selection?"

"I haven't- I stopped myself, glancing at the paper she was holding.

Oh. My. God.

Snatching it out of her hands, I scurried to better lighting, trying to get a good look at the picture. It was fuzzy at best, but you could see Kado and I together; his fricken coat on my shoulders and a rose in my hand.

"I told you he'd find you sexy in that blouse."

"Kathyyyy," I sighed, rubbing my temples. This wasn't so bad, but it certainly wasn't good. Kado and I were still on shaky ground and this was only going to add to his anxiety.

"Haha and I thought you were gonna be the most difficult girl to get. Tbh; one of the reasons I liked you." She laughed as I threw the paper down and collapsed on the bed behind me.

"Fan. Fucking. Tastic."

"Oh relax babe," she was full of colorful nicknames.

"It's good to set yourself out like this. Kado may be the oldest but he's also the biggest jerk- and everyone knows it. So at least you've marked your territory. " I stared at the ceiling, listening to her uncalming words.

"You make it sound like we're dogs and they're bushes. " I joked, making her chuckle.

"God he really is a jerk," I agreed, my wrists still sore.

"Maybe, but he gave you his jacket. That's one gentlemanly act- Oh! Oh! And the rose!"

"I'm the one who picked the rose."

"Pena. Honey. I'm trying to cheer you up. Give me something to work with please." I smacked my hands on my face.

"I'm sorry Kath, it's just it wasn't really a date is all. I was just um, getting fresh air and he was there too."

"So nothing happened?" I shook my head no.

"We just sat and talked. Actually we kind of just made fun of each other and talked about when we were kids, and he corrected my mannerisms ." I turned my head to look at Kathy who gave a very fake, attempting support, smile.

"That sounds actually awful." She said.

"Actually," I smiled.

"It was pretty nice in the end of it all." I thought of Kado's hand taking my own, pulling it from my face. He smelled like books and expensive colon, those eyes once so empty full with his own vulnerability. I liked how his touch felt on me as hard as it was to admit it when he was lifting me up and getting angry.

Come the next day, the women's parlor was packed with all 35 girls; none eliminated in the past three days.

It was already obvious who Ilea favored; the three prissy girls, Trixxy something, Kasia, and the other one with snowy blonde hair I couldn't remember. They always wore the perfect, poppy dresses with perfect make up, and perfect ways of talking to the press. They said the most important parts of their lives was charity, acting like they'd performed those acts cause they actually cared about people. They said they understood the horrors of war and how helping the children of the country find food and homes would comfort them despite what we faced.

Those girls were children themselves. They couldn't understand the horrors of the war. There's no way they could even imagine it from where they came. No one here understood. Not like me anyway.

"Pena!" Katherine caught me off guard, tugging at the sleeve of my sweater.

"We're trying on dresses, come pick one out." Oh fun. I got to window shop while a hoard of women glared at me.

It's strange really. I'd always wanted girlfriends, but within a few days, it felt so hard to even talk to any of them. Sure, there was Kathy, but honestly I think we just connected from being the two outsiders. We both came from far away places, we were both tall I guess? She was gorgeous though. Any of the girls would love to hang around her just for the publicity.

I gripped her flowery, practically see through shirt right back in a silent demand fueled by anxiety.

"I've never done this before," I whisper, panicked the slightest bit.

Kathy put her hands on her hips and nodded in silent understanding. Then she took both my hands and gave me a patronizing look.

"Hun, I know you're from a different place, a different culture really." Was my accent that bad?

"But look in the mirror. You can walk into a room and own everyone in it. It's all in the way you present yourself." I think she confused confidence with superiority. Nonetheless, the thought made me smile.

"Everyone you say?" I asked, smirking.

"Oh yeah. That blonde hair, those big eyes, dem legs; strut it baby." She said, taking my hand and dragging me through the crowd. I tried walking like her, smiling at how she just went through everyone like they were her subjects. She wasn't destined to be a princess. No, Katherine was born a queen.

"Hello! Hi yes," she addressed a woman tending to the tea sets.

"It's 2 a'clock dear. It's not tea time." She placed a single hand on her hip, pursing her lips.

"Can you bring us some music, actual food that isn't biscuits, and some booze?" The older maiden went to correct her.

"Katherine, I'm sorry my dear but all these girls are under age and we are under strict instructions to not let-

"It's Lady Katherine. We aren't friends. And last time I checked wine is served at all the dinners we attend. Whoever gave you these instruction; they got a problem, they can take it up with me. K? Great, I'll be waiting for those orders, but just remember I'm not patient dear." Alright. I laughed, Katherine spinning on her heels and winking with a little flip of her hair.

"Like I said, we own this place Pena." She wasn't just a queen. She was my idol.

As we walked back to one of the tables together, one of the three public favored girls intercepted Katherine, a big fake smile repulsively splayed on her round, childish face.

"Can we help you?" Please don't start a fight I pleaded in my thoughts. One of Kado's rules was to keep a generally low profile.

Kasia frowned, her jaw loosening as she tilted her shoulders to own side; I called it the brat posture.

"Katherine, we just wanted to ask you if both of you had broken the rules and gone out on dates with the princes." Kasia shot me a glare, the sixteen year old little baby pouting because her little plans hadn't panned out.

"Broken the rules?" Katherine questioned sarcastically, raising a hand in the air to laugh mockingly at the girl before us.

"Oh sweetie. What you call breaking the rules is what I call having better skills. You want a date with Kado? I suggest you become 2 years older over night, get a dress that isn't neon, and maybe shape up that little attitude of yours." God damn. I was sure as hell glad she's on my side.

"Excuse me! the purpose of the selection is to find love and bring well educated, good women together! Not to insult one another in a petty fashion." Kasia tried to educate us.

"There's no reporters around pussycat. You can drop the innocent little girl act. No one finds that attractive anymore." Katherine, held her hand up as Kasia went to speak again.

"No. Don't speak , you're only going to give me a headache." With that we walked past her, Kasia still giving me that catty stare of fury. For a little girl she could sure pack a punch with her glaring.

"Pena?" She called. I looked back unthreateningly, trying to ignore how much I wanted to throw back the breaking rules comment in her face.

"When you asked Kado out did you have to get on your knees or where you already there." Trixxy and Ter covered their mouths, their jaws dropped as they began laughing.

You see, none of these girls knew me very well .

"Neither." I said calmly.

"I'm fond of my knees, I run quite a lot. You see where I come from, if you don't know how to run, well then you didn't know how to survive." I walked forward, watching her step back as she didn't expect me to actually threaten her.

"Surviving is an important skill." I continued.

"A well educated girl such as yourself should know that one of the first rules of survival is knowing how to fight. Well, my dear... I've fought off a lot worse than you. And if you're fond of your knees, I wouldn't talk like that to me ever again." Petrified little eyes looked up at me through a layer of frightful tears and I knew I'd gone too far.

"I'm sorry," I said, admittantly a little bit too late. She was just a girl who didn't know what to do with the world when it didn't go her way.

"That was rude of me," I didn't let her answer, turning to walk to Katherine.

"What a little bitch," she said,

"Those girls really don't know what this it about do they?" I sat next to her and grabbed the wine bottle one of the maids had hesitantly brought in.

"And what is this about again?" I actually couldn't remember why I was here anymore.

Kathy got serious for a moment.

"It can't be a coincidence that the King decided to have the selection right now, when the war is at its worst and before Kine or Harry turn 18. It's a strategy, not a gift to his sons." I nodded along, remembering what Kado had told me.

"I don't know if the boys know that." I found myself hoping Kado knew, but didn't care.

"They're really sweet." She said, actually meaning it.

My thoughts of Kado were interrupted when the doors to the parlor opened wide, silencing all the women in the room. We stared at the entryway, two guards separating and standing like statues against the wall.

Katherine stood, a stern expression on her face.

Then I knew why.

The king entered, wearing his modest grey colors and golden crested crown. I'd never seen him up close, the grey of an unshaven beard spreading to the side burns of his hair. He seemed genuinely exhausted.

"Ladies," He bowed his head, the entirety of the room curtsying to him.

"Please, go back to what you were doing. I don't mean to intrude." Then why did you slam the doors open.

Katherine stayed standing as the rest of the girls hesitantly went back to conversing, their eyes still watching the king and how he surveyed the room.

He walked over to us.

"Lady Katherine, Lady Pena," I wanted to curtsy but didn't really know how, so I placed my hands behind my back and rocked myself forward in a joke of a bow. Hey at least I tried.

He smiled at me, laughing internally.

"My king," Kathy curtsied almost perfectly, her confident gaze fixed on him.

"Lady Pena," he looked to me.

"Would you mind if I borrowed the lady?"

"No. Please go right ahead," And so he took her arm in the crook of his. They seemed strangely familiar, as if they'd met once a long time ago like Kado and I.

As they walked out of the room, I sat... By myself, drinking the glass of wine I desperately hoped would make the world feel like lonesome at the moment.

God I missed home.

Only a few moments after Katherine had left, Kent and Kine entered the room and I swear the tension rose tenfold. All the girls got in a single file, smiling ridiculously and fixing their hair up quickly, patting their dresses down, the works.

Harry followed in, the smallest of the brothers coyly standing just behind his elders. He really was an adorable boy; his youthful air stirring a warmth in whoever he spoke to.

I waited for Kado, expecting him to walk in for the sake of the cameras.

But he didn't. Instead, Kent began talking like an announcer.

"Hello ladies." He welcomed.

"We've been so thrilled to finally be able to meet with all of you." I knew Kent had been on dates with two of the girls already, but they were all short meetings made very publicly known to us... Not late at night with one of the girls in her nightgown.

"I'm sorry Kado won't be able to join us today, he has been indisposed due some issues he must attend with my father." I could just imagine him in the office, chewing his nails, aggressively writing down everything of importance. The ulcers in his stomach churning on enough acid to burn a hole through a ships hull. He was so young to be dealing with the war at this level, but perhaps not from where I stood.

"What issues are those?" I didn't realized I'd actually said that outloud. I was standing at the end of the line.

Kent looked over at me with a patient air.

"I'm sorry Lady Pena, I'm not at liberty to discuss."

"It's very boring stuff anyway," Kine said, winking to Trixxy and the snowy blonde haired Rana.

I nodded, retreated back to my place.

They'd come to get to meet the rest of the women. To my dismay, Kent came up and tried talking to me. I wasn't sure what he wanted, but Kado mentioned the competitive nature of the second eldest.

"You don't like it here do you?" He asked, sitting beside me in one of the sofas I'd found refuge in. Both my arms were crossed loosely over my chest, my knee folded over the over in a relaxed fashion.

"On the contrary," I smiled.

"This is quite a beautiful place." He looked up at the ceilings and nodded.

"When I was little I thought the same thing."

"Not anymore?" I asked. He shook his head.

"I've had the good fortune to see Europe and many other parts of the world. Now that I'm home, this is more of a pretty cage than anything else."

"Aye, a pretty cage." I repeated, tracing the chain like gold patterns on the cushions.

"Not for you though," he reminded me.

"You may not technically be allowed to leave until we all decide it's time for you to go home, but if you ever want to leave, just know I'll allow it ok?" He said, as if this was his selection alone.

Kent confused me, not by his words, but by how he approached everything; like Kado had. Everything was a strategy to him; even finding love.

"What makes you think I want to leave?" He sat back, his arm splayed across the couch's spine.

"For starters you're sitting by yourself." I smiled in regretted admittance.

"I guess it's hard for me to make friends in such a different culture. But I have Katherine." He seemed discontent with my answer, needing more to go on.

"And there's Kado." I said, wishing I hadn't. Kent shrugged and pulled a glass full of champagne to his lips. He was younger than I was by a bit, yet he seemed so much adult in all he did.

"Kado's a good guy- a good brother, but I would hardly call him friend material," playing with a loose thread of my t-shirt in my lap, I thought about it.

A good person isn't necessarily an approachable one.

"I disagree," I said nonetheless.

"He may be a bit harsh, if you don't mind my saying so, but sometimes I think he'd be happier if- I stopped myself, Kent waiting for me to finish my sentence. The chocolate brown hair fell in front of his eyes, eyes he shared with Kado; that warm, inviting color in his irises.

"Happier if what?"

Reluctantly, I finished the though outright, grasping at the pendant on my necklace.

"If he didn't have so much pressure put on him. I know all three of you have so many expectations to live up to, but dealing with all he has to deal with would make me a little snippy too." Kent didn't get angry. Actually, he seemed surprised at my level of insight.

He finished his glass, dropping it back down on the table.

"Kado's always been a little quiet. always kept to himself even when we were kids. He never wanted anything to do with anyone except his family." That wasn't hard to believe.

"But He's going to make a good king because he cares about his people." That wasn't either.

"I know," I said, the words barely audible as I thought of Kado in his crown. I pictured how the crafts of gold would get tangled in his bloody hair.

I didn't think it was possible, but Kent's expression actually stiffened.

" good kings often don't make good husbands." And he was not playing nice anymore.

"Good kings makes good decisions." I replied,

"That is all I care about." To my surprise... He actually smiled.

"Lady Pena." A loud voice from behind the couch called my name and I jumped, Kent catching me as I fell back. Oh how awkward this had become.

The guard who'd called my name, stared down at me, expecting us to stand.

"I'm sorry to disturb you, but his majesty prince Kado requests your presence."

"What?"

"Again?" Kent was just as shocked as I was.

"Did he say why?"

"No my lady, but I have strict instructions to escort you to him."

Proceeding to follow the guard, I stood anxiously, looking back at Kent apologetically.

"Don't worry. Go ahead," He said, grabbing another fancy glass from his table.

"Are you sure?"

He nodded.

"Kado's a prick for not taking this seriously, but hey; if he's contributing I at least have to give him that." I put my hand on his, our exchanged smiles a little goodbye before he raised his glass to me and shot down the golden liquid.

With that, the guard brought me into the hall and down to Kado's chambers.

* * *

I'd never seen a chamber. Sure I had a bedroom back home, but mine didn't have two bulletproof white gold embroidered doors and guards posted outside of it.

It made me nervous; the whole invite. Kado and I's agreement was solid and we understood each other, but there was still a side of him that wasn't completely controlled by his senses.

Knocking on the door lightly, I expected a butler or maid to answer, welcome me into his room with a speech about etiquette.

But no one did. Instead I waited there, for a minute, knocking harder.

Was he just trying to play games with me?

Finally one of the heavy doors opened, Kado arm hanging up on the frame.

His face was sullen, dark circles surrounding the veiny whites of his eyes. The bright red of his hair had grown greyer, a few solely lifeless strands hanging on his forehead. He wasn't wearing a shirt, only grey sweatpants that stopped at the v of his hips. He was quite beautiful, even like this, all disheveled; especially, like this, all disheveled. I found myself looking at him up and down. My hands wanted to touch the muscles of his abdomen, see if they felt as sharp as they looked. Perhaps I'd judged him too quickly when I thought him poised and polished.

Careful, Pena. I reminded myself. It's dangerous to play with an untamed horse.

"You know there's pictures of me everywhere," he said, drawing me back to his face.

"Might want to refer to those instead of well, embarrassing yourself," His reference to our first breakfast together made me sneer.

"Don't flatter yourself clown head." I replied, trying to scoop up whatever pride I had left.

"At least I stare in private." He licked his lips to stop himself from smiling. I made my way past him and into the room and he shut the door behind him.

"So why am I here? You wanted a sequel to your newspaper?" His room was a mess, his bed unmade, the balcony windows open, his desk covered in an endless stack of papers. There were small stains of blood on the carpet beneath it.

"Saw that did you?" He asked, one of his hands reaching back behind his head to grab at the extra tufts. The anxiety provoked habit revealed the way his arms moved, a way I'd never noticed. He moved like a soldier, disciplined posture and a physic of a man who trained like one.

"You could have told me there was a reporter hiding in the bushes. I would've worn something less revealing than a nightgown." Sitting in his desk chair he leaned back and immediately started working on other matters.

"Thought you'd be happy to get some publicity. Being seen with my coat on your shoulders. Makes you more likely to fit in right?" That was a low shot; even for him.

Never let people see the hurt in your eyes; I had to remember that more than ever.

Kado waited for me to answer, and when I didn't he looked up. Perhaps he didn't see how the comment got to me, but he knew that part of our agreement included not making fun of things we'd said in confidence.

"I'm sorry," He said.

"I didn't know about the reporter. I promise."

"I believe you," I reassured him, walking to stand by his balcony.

"So why am I here?" I asked.

"My father told me I should start going out with some of the other selected." He crossed out something, rewriting over it, the stress in him beyond apparent.

"But he already thinks you've gone out with me once." I furrowed my brows, confused.

"And?"

"And isn't going on another 'date' with me exactly the opposite of what he's asking?"

"Yup."

"Defying your father wasn't part of our agreement Kado," I reminded, wishing he'd put a fricken shirt on.

"You aren't defying my father." He said, standing up to go to his night table.

"I am." He spoke with a bottle of whiskey in his hand, taking out the cork with his teeth and spitting it onto the floor. And he saw it fit to correct my manners?

"What did I say about wearing dresses?" He warned, grabbing the hem of my shirt in his fingers.

"Some of the girls weren't wearing them today-

"Those girls aren't the ones being seen or associated with me." He was starting to become aggravating.

"Start obeying the rules Pena. This deal won't last if you look like you just got back from a homeless shelter."

"Alright that's enough." I said, watching him gulp down some more of the potent liquid.

"I don't know what happened yesterday but I'm assuming the stick up your ass has something to do with how insufferable you're being."

As I tore his hand off my shirt, the doors to what I assumed was his closet opened, a half naked girl walking out holding a maid's hat and pile of clothes.

"Oh I'm sorry," she said, not realizing what she was interrupting.

"Get dressed and get out Nina." Kado spoke insensitively, the young girl scurrying to dress herself. She was such a tiny woman, skinny and short with Raven black hair and big green eyes.

When she finally left the room, Kado started at me again.

"Do you realize what could've happened to you if she heard you talk like that to me- if she told my father what you just said?" He wasn't going to get off that easy.

"She's shagging the heir to the crown. If she wants to keep her head on her shoulders she'll keep her mouth shut." I whispered, his eyes widening at me in disbelief.

"You actually think I'm that stupid?" The question wasn't rhetorical.

"You actually think I'd fuck a maid? Do you know what my father would do to her?" Maybe he thought I was stupid.

"What else am I supposed to think when a half naked girl walks out of your closet?"

"What do you care if- he stopped himself, licking his lower lip. A glint shinned in the rim of his eyes, a long, sly smirk forming on his face.

"What now?" I asked.

"Nothing, nothing." He assured me.

"It's just that, I get it know," he said, wiping his nose, keeping himself from laughing.

"You're just jealous," He did not just say that.

"You did not just say that." I crossed my arms and side eyed him. Then his laugh erupted, his heavy chest shaking.

"Why else would you be so pissy right now?" He crossed his arms too, the bulk of his biceps flexing against him.

Stop. Looking. At. Him. Like. That. I told myself, snapping out of it.

"I'm 'pissy' because you don't. Tell. Me. Anything." His deception, his lying by omission, the constant game of angel and devil he played.

"Rule number 1; I say everything you tell me to. That doesn't mean I can't ask questions." He didn't like a woman that argued, I could already tell. But he liked a challenge.

"That's not my closet." He said, pointing to the doors.

"Then what is it?" He shook his head, grabbing a white undershirt from his dresser. His back flexed as he stretched the shirt onto his body. Under patting his hands, his hair flattened from the bright, puffy mess it was.

"Are you going to answer me? Or leave me wondering why half naked women wander in and out of it?" He looked at me, silently, up and down. His eyes lingered on me, as if he was trying to figure out something. I uncrossed my arms, not feeling the need to defend myself.

"What's wrong Kade?" Immediately his gaze darted to mine, silently growling a warning with only that look.

"Are you wondering what I'd look like walking out of that room?" I was not so easily discouraged as all the other people in his life.

"Rule number two Pena. Your rule." He winked, going to sit at his desk to work again.

I think I'd finally come to understand what he was doing, all his plans, all his strategies.

His father was a bad king, and even worse father. Kado loved him, I had no doubt, but it's not hard to know when tensions are high in a castle like this.

His whole life he was told this war was his shared responsibility, along with the crown. But that's the problem.

Kings grow to like their power. When they begin to grey and their children become grown, it is hard to accept the reality.

Kado will be king soon. He is competent, serious, dedicated, intelligent, incredibly well minded when it comes to strategy. He will be king because he has better ideas to end the war than his father ever did.

And that's why I'm here.

Whenever Kado gets shot down, under minded, he is a child who does not know how to express his pain.

So, in turn, he defies the one who makes him suffer.

When he is forced to go through the selection, Kado refuses to take the girls seriously.

When he is ordered to broaden options, he remains with me.

"Nina." He said, calling me back, still writing impatiently.

"She's sleeping with my father." Now that, I didn't expect.

"She takes the back hallways to get out of his room so she can't be seen. Unfortunately, that hall ends in my room. So, I let her escape this way." I didn't expect that either.

"Why?" I asked, my voice soft and quiet.

His pen stilled and he swallowed before uttering words he should never utter to anyone in the world.

"It's not her fault her king has no morality." I wasn't looking, but I felt his mind resume to what it was tending to before.

"It's not yours either." I whispered. Again I wasn't looking, but his eyes were on me then. I could feel them.

Kado kept me in his room a little while longer, our 'date' allowing him to do his work while I wandered around the mess. His dresser was scratched, clothes unfolded, books laid about, open to random pages marked with his notes.

His handwriting was quiet messy too, the half cursive half gibberish inky messages barely readable. Still I tried, finding his copy of The Temptress open to a page in which God converses with a man about the evils of the world.

"The devil comes disguised as a beautiful woman." it read, underlined with the words, "But sometimes so does the angel ." Written next to it in blue ink.

I couldn't help but smile at how literary he could be, a talent wasted in the generally boring nature of war.

In the center of his room was a piano, white and shinning, built by artisans and men who mastered the precision of music. As I walked around it, I made my way to Kado's desk, tired of loitering about.

Peaking over his shoulder, I tried to read as much as I could. Nothing of importance was resting on top, only the lists of outgoing battalions and weapon costs.

To his right, I looked at the designs of tanks and guns, ones I wasn't familiar with. Holding my pendant anxiously, I tried to read what he was writing, but without such luck.

Looking all the way to the right, I found something different from the bevy of articulated and numerical violence.

"Watch" it read on the corner of the page and beneath it music notes lined the evenly written words. Beautiful, finely stroked music notes. I could only make out a few words of the actual writing however...

It was a song.

A loud smack interrupted my attempts to read, Kado's hand clamping down over the paper. I jumped, scurrying backwards, almost tripping over myself.

"Rule number 5." He spoke.

"Ever try and spy on me like that again and you won't like what comes next."

I nodded frantically, not afraid of him; just that uncontrolled side that burst out whenever he was angry. He seriously needed to work on that.

"Can you not be annoying for my than a few minutes? Go read a book, take a nap, watch tv, do something other than be a complete pain in my ass." His legs stiffened to the ground as he sat hunched over his desk. What a spiteful little man he was.

"Can I help you with that?" I said, pointing to the paper he was writing.

"With what?"

"Whatever you're doing." I tried to seem confident, acting unsurprised when he denied me.

"Ha! That's a laugh." He said.

"I barely trust women making my meals-

"But not with cleaning your bedchamber?" I teased, not at all pleased with his level of sexism. He still held a certain smugness.

"You forget where I'm from my prince." I reminded.

"I've seen more war than you probably ever will. I've watched my neighbors be shot and buildings get torn down. I've lost more friends to the fighting than I care to admit. I've looked out my window to see the forest burning and the sky fill with smoke." He wasn't completely unsympathetic, giving me the decency to be quiet and remove the smirk from his face.

"I almost lost my brother and father more times can I count. I lost my mother." His eyes drew up directly to mine, that vulnerability, that warmth he'd only revealed to me once before in the garden. It was there, staring into me, a kind of wordless plea shinning in the glassy look he gave.

"Almost lost myself," I whispered.

"That was harder to admit than I thought." I said, licking my lips and looking down at the floor.

I shut my eyes and tried to breath quietly, anxiety twisting my gut into a knot that sent shivers to my spine. I felt all cold, lonely, wishing I could be home in my brother's company listening to my father's lectures. I wanted to feel the warmth of the fire against my skin in the darkness, singing to myself.

Even in the midst of fear, it's better to feel afraid than alone.

Suddenly, i felt warmth around me, not fire, but arms wrapped around me. Opening my eyes, I watched Kado's chest, rising and falling against my head. His hands placed themselves on the cusp of my shoulder blades, both arms holding me tightly against him.

His head rested on top of mine, and for some time we stayed like that, my eyes able to close as I felt comfort in his touch.

"Did they hurt you?" He asked, his arms letting me go as he lightly touched my sleeve to reveal scars up my forearms.

I shook my head no.

"Fire may harm soldiers, but it does not harm your enemy." I said, his pulse quickening on mine.

"Dragons did this to you?"

"Not purposefully, no."

"The barrens is so close to where they lurk. It's not safe for anyone to live there." He said, raising my arm to his face so he could get a closer look.

"They're disgusting, cruel beasts. We'll defeat them though." He uttered, letting my arm go and making fists.

"The other opposing sides despise them just as much as Illeans. The only reason they still exist is because of the men who support them." He was wrong.

"They're menacing because they do not burn, but they're weak in their isolation. They'll fall easily." He assured me. Little did he know how much worse this all made me feel.

"Have you ever seen a dragon?" I asked. He looked a bit confused, but shook his head none the less.

"Then you can't know how strong they are- how powerful they are as one. The people of the world have been trying to extinct them for generations." I said, gripping at the silver pendant.

"They were here before us. They'll be here after us. Neither war nor guns will ever diminish that fact."

The line of his jaw bulged as he bit down on his own teeth, not out of frustration, but rather out of defeat.

"What is it?" I asked.

He smiled.

"I've just been so wrong about you over and over since they day you got here. I'm wondering when you're going to stop surprising me."

"Rule number six." I said

"You're always wrong. Do best to remember that." I winked and he gave a throaty, closed mouth chuckle


	5. Chapter 5

**Tip for this chapter; listen to watch by Billie eilish when Pena begins singing.**

 **I didn't write the song, but it fit so well for this scene to use. I did alter some of the wording, because the song is about love and that's not what it's meant to represent in this story.**

 **Pena POV**

* * *

so, Ya; enjoy.

"Do you play the piano?" Kado asked me, finally dressed properly. He wore a white dress shirt with black pants, grabbing the blazer that went with it and throwing it on his desk chair.

"Never had the chance to learn." I said, sitting at the bench of his piano because it looked like the only seat that wasn't covered in something.

"But I can read music," I said, partly lying.

"Well that's one useful skill," he answered, fully condescending.

Sitting beside me on the bench, he began rolling up his sleeves, motioning for me to do the same.

"Oh are we actually doing this?" I asked, surprised that for once the paperwork had taken a standstill in his life.

"You might have noticed I'm not the most sensitive when it comes to others." That was the understatement of the year.

"But i'm human. Sometimes I can't handle things." Rule number 4, I reminded him in my head.

"The piano it just- it helps me cope." He said, his fingers pressing down a certain way to make the piano sing.

"My mom taught me." He said, playing another chord.

"I always told her I wanted to play for myself, not for others," another chord sang, this one lighter, a more joyful side of the instrument revealed.

"One night when my father caught me playing in one of his priceless, collectible cars he yelled at me so loud I barricaded myself in my room." Another press of his fingers and his other hand joined in.

"When mother finally convinced me to come out of hiding, she told me that my father was wrong to yell at a boy for his curiosity." Soon a certain melody began to take shape as his fingers danced on the keyboard.

"She took me to the common room and played me a song to calm my shaking." I'd noticed his anxiety resurface whenever he lost control of himself, but when his hands were on the keys, his face was still, at peace even.

"The next year, my father told me I was going to be king, that I needed to begin taking responsibility, that I was going to be as great as he was. That night I prepared a speech to give to the entire castle." He told me the story absentmindedly, forgetting I was listening I think.

"He tore it in half and told me to go up there and say something better." The song moved slowly, but the slight shift in the tone conveyed the anger and frustration a little boy would've felt.

"I was biting my lip and my tongue so hard I drew blood. My hands shook violently. I just convinced myself I wasn't meant to be what he wanted me to be. I couldn't even get up on the stage." He laughed, looking over at me. Just by the way he immidietaly looked away I could tell he hated the pity in my eyes.

But it wasn't pity really. It was more of an understanding of how he felt.

"My mother went up there for me and the whole kingdom loved her for it." He sighed.

"As did I." The little melody ended with three deep chord, an ending unlatching with his voice.

"Is that was watch is about?" I asked, crossing a line.

He furrowed his brows at me.

"The song you wrote." I reminded.

"It's about your anxiety. Your father." I said. He swallowed something, perhaps fear.

"It's not finished." He muttered, refusing to answer my question.

"I don't care. It's beautiful." I said, touching the place where his sleeve met his arm. He looked down at my hand as if it didn't belong there.

"You have no idea how much I wish I could right something like that." He shook his head again, a defense I had not yet broken down.

"Why don't you play it?" My hand remained as I refused to let the question go unanswered.

"It wouldn't make much an impact without the words."

"Then sing it"

"I don't sing."

"Why not?"

"Because I don't. That's not me. I'm not good with words."

"Bullshit. I've seen what you do with your books. You correct the morality of an authors statement. You add something that would make the passage infinitely better just with your words." Flexing his jaw, he laid his hands down in his lap and rubbed the back of his neck to grab at his hair.

"You really gotta stop looking through my stuff." He said.

"No Kade." I caught his attempt to dodge me.

"You're not getting off that easy."

"I don't sing Pena." He said, much more seriously this time.

"My mother was always the one who sang." It was hard to argue with that. If I pushed any harder the memory of his mom would be tarnished by my selfishness. So instead, I stood, circling the piano as I watched the art of the instrument unfold. At least that way he didn't feel confined by me.

"How did you learn to read music?" He asked.

"I used to sing when we were underground during the attacks," I said, not realizing it was out loud. I'd never told anyone that; only my father and brother knew that.

"You sang for people in their most desperate moments," he said, as if it was something I should be proud of. I answered with a half broken smile, one of memories I wished to not remember.

"Sing for me," he said, the command gentle and soft spoken.

I shook my head.

"I never said I sang well."

"I honestly doubt that you don't."

"I wouldn't know what to sing."

"Anything. I'll pick it up." He said, his hands on the keys again.

An idea came to me then. I raised my hand up and ran back to his desk, looking to the right where I'd found the music sheets.

"What are you doing?" He asked, leaning over to get a look at me.

"Just a second." I said, going through the pieces as quickly as I could, his handwriting easier to distinguish when i was really trying.

"Pena." He said warningly.

"What is that?" If only he knew I was trying to help him, that this would help both of us.

"Just go with me on this." I said, organizing the pieces of paper so that I could read them the right way.

"Ok are you ready?" I asked, waiting for him to give me some sort of sign he would actually do this with me.

"Fine."

"Ok." I said, smiling much wider than i should've.

"Don't look at me ok?" I asked, suddenly feeling a little self conscious.

"Are you serious?"

"Kado please!" I asked, slamming the papers against my leg.

"Ok, ok." He said, raising his hands up.

"Whenever you're ready."

Taking a deep breath, I waited for the first chord on the piano. Then, it just came naturally, my voice recognizing the words like a bird to it's own song.

Lips meet teeth and tongue...

My heart skips 8 beats at once...

If I was meant to be, I would've been by now...

See what you want to see, but I can't see how...

I'll sit and watch your car burn...

With the fire that you started in me, but you never came back to put it out...

Go ahead and watch my heart burn...

with the fire that you started in me...

But I'll never let you back to put it out...

Your love feels so fake...

My demands aren't high to make...

If I could get to sleep, I would've slept by now...

Your lies will never keep, I think you need to blow em out...

I'll sit and watch your car burn...

With the fire that you started in me..

But you never came back to put it out...

Go ahead and watch my heart burn...

With the fire that you started in me, but I'll never let you back to put it out...

I'll sit and watch your car burn...

Oooooh...

Let you burn, let you burn...

Never gonna burn me again...

His hands were fire, playing the keys like they were his soulmates, the music flowing out of him like he was born for it. Such a passion arose from his eyes, the way the melody and rhythm became part of his movements sending a whisper in my bones. As I sang his words, everything else around us went away. It was just his music, his warm eyes, his emotions that he could never show anyone. It was just our letting go of egos and barriers.

It was bare, truly his own.

His Adam's apple shifted as he swallowed, looking up at me with such peace.

"Rule number seven." He whispered.

"Never undermine your voice again." He stood, closing the piano's key's and unrolling his sleeves. He fixed on me, his hand closing over mine as he said, barely audible, "Only the few good men of this world are worthy of that voice."

* * *

 **Kado PVO**

Her voice.

That voice.

A marriage of breathtaking dreamy, elongated vocals and her bevy of repressed emotions.

She reflected me in herself, in the way the lyrics pooled out of her and danced with the melodies of the piano. There was a slight clever blend of emotion and maturity, her echoes older than herself. I found myself lost in the way her voice washed over me in its most pure — an inescapable connection to her that I wouldn't forget.

The rest of the week, it's all I could think about, that slow, contemplative, yet never dull fashion in which she sang.

Though I'd never admitted to anyone, writing those songs just helped me forget the fact that I was drowning.

Drowning from a father whom i loved, but could never admire, a wave of loneliness as I thought of my mother, and the fucking war.

"Kado, you ok?" Kent asked, reading a book too heavy for his thin shoulders in the chair beside me.

"Yeah. Actually I am." He nodded, a silent agreement between us.

Kent and I were never really close when we were young. We both mostly kept to ourselves, but not in the way you might think. Kent and I were old friends. We could sit beside one another for hours without speaking a word, just happy for the company.

"What are you reading?" I asked, staring at the fireplace.

"A history of the world." He answered, flipping on the pages and adjusting his glasses.

"Needed a break from it all," He added.

 _I hear you brother._

"How many dates have you been on since the selection started," I asked, wondering how long it'd been. I couldn't remember. All i remembered was that it'd been five days since I'd talked to Pena.

"9 I think," he said.

"It's hard to keep track at this point." He was uncharacteristically somber. Yes he was quiet like the rest of the family (excluding Kine of course), but never this depressing. Witty as he was however, sometimes he let his guard down, didn't just rely on his intelligence. Sometimes he was real with me.

"Do you like any of em? You know for real?" I asked, worried about him.

"I think at the beginning I expected something different you know?" he said, closing his book lightly and placing it on his lap.

"I thought I'd meet a girl and immediately know if I loved her." He sounded like Harry.

"That's not how love works Kent." I said as if I knew.

"Yeah?" He mumbled, tilting his head to look at me in the glow of the fire.

"How does it work exactly?" He asked, removing his glasses and throwing them over the arm of his chair.

I grabbed at the hair at my nape, such a bad habit i was starting to pull out my own hair.

"I couldn't tell you Kent. I just know that you'll find it." He shrugged, skeptical.

"No I mean it." I fought.

"If anyone deserves it its you." He shook his head at his head at me. I knew he appreciated how much I was trying.

"No Kado you don't get it. You kept telling us at the start of all this that you're not cut out for the selection. Well what if I'm not?" He raised his voice, his usually controlled self beginning to emotionalize.

"I've been trying to talk all these women and they either are so transparently motivated for things other than my affection or simply uninterested. I know you were right that night when you said that's all women do, but I was so hoping you were wrong." My poor little brother. My pessimism was starting to get the better of him.

"Kent." I said calling him back to me.

"You are the smartest person I've ever met in all my life. You're determined, you're kind, you'd make a better king than I ever will." That was a touchy subject. I knew he wanted to be king and my father wanted the same. Sometimes I wanted that too.

"There is a girl out there that will see that in you. She'll love you for all you are. I can just feel it." I said, desperately hoping he wouldn't give up as I had.

"Maybe she's not in these 35 women. But you can always tell Dad that you never found what you were looking for. You can travel, go see the world you love so much. You'll find someone ok? Maybe not now, but you will-

"Kado just stop," he begged.

"Dad is never gonna let us walk out of this without four marriages to look forward to. Don't get me wrong, I like some of them, but I can see what they want in me; and its not what I'm willing to give." He couldn't know how much I related to that; how much i wish i could tell him about myself so that'd he'd understand why I act the way I do.

"I get it," I said.

"This really is a shitshow isn't it." I grabbed the glass of vodka next to me, hoping Kent would think it was water.

"Haha, Harry and Kine are certainly enjoying themselves," he chuckled, watching me down the liquid and wince.

"Ignorance is bliss isn't it?" I agreed.

"Kine just hits on them trying to get in their pants and Harry's just well- acting like a kid." Kent informed me, surprised by our own brothers even though that's literally all they ever did.

"Has Kine slept with any of them?" I asked, surprised he could actually pull it off.

"Are you kidding? He's lucky he hasn't been neutered yet. He's even trying to play innocent like Harry to get their attention too." I couldn't help but laugh with him.

"Oh Kine. What an unwise little boy he can be sometimes." He added.

"It may be an unwise man who doesn't learn from his own mistakes, but it's an absolute idiot that doesn't learn from someone else's." Kent gave a full bellied chuckle, one I'd rarely heard from him.

"Have you ever noticed how pretentious he is too?" Kent asked.

"He'd eat a worm if I gave it a french name." I answered, Kent's face twisting up and blowing a raspberry as he laughed over himself.

I loved this; seeing him like this.

"He really is a great guy," Kent said, watching me turn the glass back and forth through my fingers on the arm of my chair.

"Well the girls agree. There's only two girls he hasn't been out with." Holy shit.

"He's been on 33 dates in two weeks!?" I asked, baffled.

"Well we've eliminated seven girls so far cause none of us were interested and we sure as hell knew you weren't; so actually probably closer to 40." goddamn Kine.

"Jesus," I whispered, trying to imagine Kine running around spitting one cheesy pick up line after another.

"Who hasn't gone out with him?" I asked.

"Well he hasn't asked Katherine cause she'd kick him in the balls." Wasn't false.

"And he hasn't asked Pena for obvious reasons,"

"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked, rushing to defend her for some reason. She was an insufferably intolerable bitchy person, but when she let her guard down… i don't know i just liked being around her.

"Come on Kado," What was Kent implying here.

"You've basically claimed her and we all know it." What the fuck? My face showed how appalled I was at his comment.

"You've gone out on like 3 dates, 2 of which have been with her. You put your coat on her shoulders. You invited her into your room. I mean we're not even allowed in there." My forehead scrunched up.

"And the third date was so dad would get off your case about you favoring her." My date with Katherine was an act too and she called me out on it. Never had I met a woman so disinterested in me entirely. I mean at least Pena admitted to finding me attractive. Katherine literally just shot me down. I didn't know if it was out of friendship or genuine interest in another one of my brothers.

"You know it's an act right? I do it all so dad leaves me the hell alone." I tried to convince Kent, but he wasn't buying it.

"See I would believe that, but you're a terrible liar." He said, aggravating me.

"No you don't get it; we made a deal. I keep here as long as I can so she doesn't have to go back to the Barren Isles and she pretends to be in love with me in front of the cameras and dad." He rolled his eyes at me.

"Even if that were true, I'm not blind Kado. I see how you look at her."

"How do I look at her exactly?"

"Constantly, for one." He said, smirking as he was getting to me. Perhaps him and Pena were more similar than I thought.

"And like you wanna fuck her." He added, tastelessly.

"Yeah. She's hot. Sue me."

"You know you wouldn't be so defensive if I was wrong." He arched a single brow, defeating me as I couldn't argue anymore.

I shrugged back into my chair, tightening up and crossing my arms like a bratty little child.

"It's not such a bad thing Kado," he said, standing to poke the fire.

"She likes you too. Could turn into something." She did? How the hell would he know?

"How the hell would you know? All we do is get on each other's nerves."

"We've talked a few times. Everytime I go to undermine something about you she jumps to your defense." She did?

"You undermine me to women?"

"Well I gotta try something so they focus on me." I laughed, surprisingly okay with it.

"Seriously Kado," He said, moving a log into the pile.

"Don't rule her out cause you're stubborn."

"You think I'm stubborn you should spend an afternoon with her. The woman is insencent."

"Ya I bet," He said, punching my shoulder.

"Must be awful having a girl who likes you for you." He said, making me wonder if she really did. That afternoon when she sang and I played the piano, I saw her as more than a business partner. I finally connected with her in a way. And she was helping me, trying to get me to let it out so I wouldn't always be so miserable. She told me about her past and the war just to get me to work with her instead of against her. I may have hugged her out of the impulse to comfort her, but in the same time I just wanted to feel her, look into her eyes when her guard was down and she could be open with me.

"There's the National Hunger Drive Banquet this weekend," he reminded me, back in his chair staring at the flames.

"I know you're busy with war preparations and that sort of thing, but-

"I'll be there." I promised, knowing it meant a lot to him.

"Should I bring a girl?" I asked, making him smile thinking I meant Pena.

"No it's against the rules; can't bring girls to public events. Too much favoritism remember?" I nodded, remembering the list of rules father recited to us when he'd yelled at me for disobeying him.

All I could think about was Pena singing Watch as he scolded me.

That song.

I never would have imagined it sounding so good, so accurate as to how I felt.

"I'm gonna go work on my speech ok?" Kent said, standing to leave.

"Don't stay up too late little brother," I said, pushing him as he walked by me. He smiled, flicking my head.

"Yeah, yeah, get your hair cut loser. You look like you're gonna have an afro."

* * *

 **idontwannabeyouanymore billie Ellish (listen to it by the end :)**

 **Kado POV**

I spent the next morning wandering the halls, looking for Pena.

I needed to see her again, needed to hear that voice again.

She usually went to the track every morning, running her heart out and showing up at breakfast with that little shine of adrenaline still in her eyes.

I had no luck finding her there. The athletics department was empty other than the few guards shaping up before their shifts.

As I walked through the hall, the sun not yet completely risen, I stopped at her room.

I'd never been in there before, but it wasn't technically against the rules to be invited in. Actually it was against the rules for her not to let me in.

Before knocking on the door, I halted, questioning what it was I actually wanted to say to her. It was a good question considering I didn't know what the hell was happening to me.

"Oh my god, stop." I heard Pena's voice saying with a laugh through the door. She sounded giddy, girly. What I usually hated in women I suddenly liked hearing in her tone.

"Come onnn Pena. You gotta tell us, it's only fair," That was Fawn's voice I think; the dark, shorter one who couldn't be more than Harry's age.

"I'm telling you." She fought.

"We just hang out and talk and stuff," Were they talking about me?

"Ya," Katherine's voice came out sarcastic.

"You guys 'talk'." She laughed and just through her words I could tell she was signing quotations around the facicius wording.

"We do!" Pena argued, laughing at them.

"Have you at least kissed?" Fawn asked.

"No, he's not really interested in that kind of thing."

"Not interested my ass! Have you seen how he looks at yours? He's like an indecent tiger." Katherine was walking around the room, her voice louder and quieter as she got closer and further from the door.

Did I really make it that obvious?

Pena sighed loudly.

"Well, Kine and I have kissed. He's so dreamyyy," Fawn said, making me want to hurl my guts out.  
Thinking I'd had enough, I knocked on the door, startling them all.

"Who is it?" Katherine called, as if it was her room.

"Oh no one, just an indecent tiger." I said, hoping they were all freaking out in there.

Pena opened the door, Katherine and Fawn scurrying to the corner of the room.

"Can I help you my prince?" Pena stood with one of her ankles crossed over the other, her arm up against the door's frame.

I'd never seen her bare like that before, only boy shorts and a tank top covering her. The light layer of runner's muscle on her calves and thighs outlined the mile long trek of her legs. Light pink blotches of skin exposed where she had been burned, the scars undiminishing.

"You want to go somewhere today?" I asked, trying to keep myself from sighing at the sight of her.

She smiled up at me, her face framed by the long straight locks of yellow hair.

"Where would we go?" she asked, her blushy lips curving into her little smile I hated and loved in the same time.

"Wherever you choose." I answered, hoping she'd find joy in it.

"Do I have to wear a dress?" She questioned, testing my resolve.

"Wear what you want." She wouldn't be her happy little self unless I'd said otherwise. That smile widened at my words, her legs uncrossing themselves.

Her body was such an elegant thing, subtly tempting in the way her hips glid from side to side as she walked away. Her eyes oozed defiance, but gave a sense of tenderness when she was vulnerable. Just then, they shined with a light glaze of a tired morning.

But it was how they shined a light brighter when I made her smile that got me.

Back in my room in the early afternoon, Pena and I sat quietly for what seemed like an eternity together. The rain beat down on the windows of the balcony. The once calm scenery of forestry and fields held a stormy air. Even in the mountains the rain went on.

Pena laid on the cold marble stone floor, wearing her denim shorts and tight long sleeve shirt. Simply content there against the tile, she stared up at the sky through half closed, tiresome eyelids.

Me, I sat at my desk, correcting Kent's speech for the banquet as he'd asked me to earlier.

"What about the city?" Pena's voice uttered in a sleepy tone.

"What about it?" I asked.

"We should go to the city. I've never been." Looking to her over my writing arm, I noticed how she held one of her legs crossed over the other, playing with some sort of hair elastic in her hands like a bored kitten.

"That would never work Pena. We'd get stormed by reporters and the people. Not to mention it's not safe to go without protection." The reality didn't seem to bother her too much.

"Let's not go as Pena and Kado then." She said, the fantasy of that oddly attractive.

"Let's wear disguises like spies and stuff." Her playful nature was so reserved when she was in public. It was nice to see her that way when she was only with me.

"As fun as that sounds, I don't think my dad would ever let us leave." That bottom lip pouted in defeat. Perhaps she'd only just realized I was mostly acting that morning, our little flirting sessions only for the sake of others.

"I guess you're right." she mumbled, raising herself to her feet, wearing thick cotton socks that almost made her slip. She saddened for a minute, staring out of my window with her hand up against the glass.

She reminded me a dove in a cage, those ocean eyes glassy with the need for freedom.

"I'll bring you one day ok?" I assured her.

"We'll wear baseball caps and sunglasses like your spies." I winked, inducing a little blushy smile.

"Before the selection is over?" She asked hopefully.

"Aye, before the selection is over." I nodded.

With that, she came to my desk, hovering above it, staring at the papers. They were all quite confidential items, but somehow I trusted she wouldn't let a war that'd hurt her so much into the hands of the enemy.

"Ah the selection." She repeated, lifting up a new design for a fireproof gun between her fingertips.

"What a fancy name for a distraction." She whispered, as if talking to herself.

I put down the pen and looked up at her questionably.  
"Are you sure you don't write?" placing the paper down, she let her hand curve around the edge of the table, supporting her weight on her shoulder coquettishly.

"I used to write songs like you- To deal with things that I couldn't conceptualize." She pointed to her head with two fingers.

"Now I just keep them here,"

"You stopped writing them down?" I asked.

She smiled a ghostly smile, like one that hid a certain sadness.

"Fire can't burn my thoughts right?"

Her scars held her body in a light pink shade. Despite their age, prominent on her skin. It may have reminded her of pain, but it also gave her strength I think. If she could walk away from something like that, keep her sanity; then she could survive anything.

Placing Kent's speech down I stood, taking her hand in mine.

"Come on. I still have to teach you how to play Piano remember?" She let herself be taken by me to the piano's lonely bench, smiling coyly all the way there.

Before we reach it, she shivers slightly, the cool material of the keys sending a chill through her.

"You want a sweater?" I asked, releasing her hand only to watch goosebumps form on the base of her arms. She grabs her sleeves, pulling them down over the heel of her hands.

"I'm fine." She insists, blowing out an exhale in an attempt to hide her shattering teeth.

"Mhm." I hummed unconvinced.

Leaving her at the ottoman, I grabbed an unfolded grey sweatshirt I used to wear to go training.

"Here." I said, throwing it to her.

"I don't want you catching a cold and infecting the entire palace." Without a word, she brings the sweatshirt to her face, inhaling my scent as if she doesn't completely mind it. I can't help but internally smirk at the action.

"So you already know how to read music right?" I ask as she places the sweatshirt over her head, pulling it down and onto her.

"Mostly yeah." She says, fixing her ponytail.

"Okay well that's a good start."

I spent the next hour teaching her the basics of placing your hands on the keyboard, using her limited knowledge on notes and tempo to guide her through it all.

I admired her patience in it, her hands quite clumsy in a childish way. She'd hit a few flat chords and laugh at herself, fixing it on the third or fourth try.

Eventually, she began to form a few synching melodies. I even caught her trying to hum along to them once or twice, catching herself and remaining quiet.

If only she knew how much I wished she'd just let herself sing.

"I really gotta cut my hair." She said, the length of her pony tail getting caught in her hands as she tried to adjust it.

 _No. You don't._ I thought to myself.

"You're telling me," I said, my hands in my lap as she laughed at the bright red that had outgrown me desperately.

She laughed, covering her mouth with her hand now covered in the heaviness of my sweatshirt.

"Why don't you cut it?" She asked, pulling a single lock by my ear and running it through her fingers tenderly.

I wished she'd do that more often, just to feel that affection.

"My mom used to cut my hair." I answered, watching her face turn pitiful.

"Oh." She uttered, her hand retreating into her.

"I'm sorry." she whispered, wincing as if ashamed to talk about it.

"It's fine." I reassured her.

"She just used to do it a certain way and I don't like the thought of someone I don't know doing it." I said, grabbing at those tufts of her hair at the back of my head. She noticed when I did that I think, realizing the anxious habit was, well, an anxious habit.

"I don't mean to be intrusive," She says, grabbing my hand and gently forcing it away from my hair.

"but I could do it." She let go of my hand, pulling the sleeves of grey up to her fingertips.

"You?" I questioned, pondering the idea.

"Well you know me, don't you?"

"Hm." I hum with a smile.

 _I'd like to think I do…_

We spent the rest of the afternoon with one another in that tangle of piano and rain. I played her some joyful little melodies I remembered and hummed to myself.

When I stopped playing, she grabbed headphones from my night table and in the spirit of a cool, stormy day, she danced. She danced indie like movements, mouthing words to songs she once knew.

I liked her like that; wearing my sweatshirt that reaches down her thighs and the sleeves way past her finger tips. Her soul is relaxed, unaware of my watching eyes. She looks made for this; just a gentle thing who needs to dance her worries away.

She caught me watching her and smiled- not with smugness, no; more with comfort and confidence that I like what I see. Trying to make me laugh, she words lyrics to a rap song, moving her shoulder a certain way.

"Feeling yourself?" I asked in a laughing breath.

Spinning around on the balls of her feet, she nodded with wide, toothy smile.

Smiling at her myself, I felt the want to stand and let her take me into how she moved, to take my hands in her own. In that moment, I felt like she was mine, dancing in my clothes to my music.

When the songs finished, she threw herself on the floor again, playfully, resting her heavy lidded eyes with a sigh of contentment. She soon stood as she noticed I was still watching her, the playful little kitten still a lion.

"You're staring again Kade," She winked, coming to sit at the piano once more.

"Can you sing me something?" I asked, surprising myself at the suddenness.

"You want me to sing your song again?" She agreed, not too objecting.

"No. I want to hear something you wrote." And I really did.

"I don't have sheet music, you couldn't play it." She said, placing one of those untamed curls behind her ears shyly.

"I'll just listen." I whispered.

She nodded, reluctantly, standing up to circle the concert sized piano.

"Can I turn around?" She doesn't want to look at me, that shyness in her still alive.

"Mhm," I nodded, watching her slowly turn and begin humming to herself.

 _Ba, da, da, da, da, Ba da, da, da, da_

The second I hear her voice, my eyes shut, put at ease by that voice.

Then she started, singing the songs in her head.

 _Don't… be that way…_

 _Fall apart twice a day…_

 _I just wish you could feel what you say…_

 _Show, never tell, but I know you too well…_

 _Got a mood that you wish, you could sell…_

 _If teardrops could be bottled, there'd be swimming pools filled by models…_

 _Told a tight dress is what makes you a whore…_

 _If I love you, was a promise…_

 _Would you break it, if you're honest…_

 _Tell the mirror what you know she's heard before…_

 _I don't wanna be you… anymore…_

 _Hands getting cold, losing feelings, getting old…_

 _Was I made from a broken home…_

 _Hurt; I can shake, we made every mistake..._

 _Only you know the way.. that I break.._

 _If teardrops could be bottled, there'd be swimming pools filled by models..._

 _Told a tight dress is what makes you, A whore…_

 _If i love you was a promise, would you break it, if you're honest…_

 _Tell the mirror, what you know she's heard before…_

 _Oh, I don't wanna be you…_

 _I don't wanna be you…_

 _I don't wanna be you… anymore_


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 15

Pena POV

I loved the rain. The calmness before the storm was a reference I could never understand. For me the calmness resided in the storm itself; a kind of powerful natural thing that brought comfort to me. The loud intraciousies of thunder and the bright shows of lighting, that didn't bring me fear. Actually it rather brought me a certain kind of joy. The rain taught me of the beauty in chaos, how even such untamed, misjudged phenomena can be so incredible beneath the surface.

Kado. My mind began to rouse from my dreariness. I was wearing Kado's sweatshirt still, I laid on the floor with his headset playing faded songs tangled in my hair. I was so tired, drifting in and out of consciousness. Kado, he was at his desk once again, overwhelmed by his work to no end. I found myself tilting my head to look over at him sometimes. He looked so enthralled in whatever he was doing all the time. Every now and then he'd glance at over his shoulder. Sure it was judgmental, but I could tell he was wondering about what I was doing.

He ignored me though almost the entire time I laid there.

And yet…

"Pena," I heard the throaty voice over my head. It had a musical little tone to it, trying to coddle me awake like a sleeping baby.

"Mmmm," I groaned, stretching my limbs and as my eyes fluttered open.

A blurry vision of Kado appeared, crouching over me with overgrown bloody hair falling over his endearing eyes. Arms laid over his knees, he just glanced down with a single raised eyebrow, unquestioning of my strangeness.

"Did I fall asleep again?" I asked, my voice rusty and loaded.

He just smiled with amusement. I have to admit he was handsome like that; quite playful with my name on his lips.

Clearing my throat, I attempted to lift myself up, ungracefully if anything. My spine was sore, each vertebrate slightly bruised by the uncomfortable, coldness beneath. I must've looked like I'd been run over by a car.

"You'd be more comfortable if you just laid in my bed," Kado muttered, trying to wake me up with that mocking way he flirted.

"I don't want to catch diseases," I shot back, raising both my eyebrows at him and twisting my head back and forth to stick my tongue out at him. "You shouldn't sleep on the floor then," he said, his floor actually probably the cleanest portion of his room.

I rolled my eyes, his hand reaching out to take mine. He was always so put together, as that was expected of him I guess. Always in a suit, always standing up straight, always acting like he didn't give a crap about anything expect his duties.

Even so, sometimes he let go of all that. Sometimes he was just vulnerable, showing me his songs, and letting himself laugh with me.

I liked those moments he was just a boy who forgot he was a king. It was rare, but those moments were mine anyway and I took pride in them.

"Oh!" The ground seemed to slide out from under me as I lifted, I stumbling down. In a reflex, I reached for Kado's shoulders. He caught me with a single movement of his arm, the rest of his body still. Those glassy brown eyes caught me too. With his arm wrapped around my waist and my palms clinging to the muscles on his shoulders, he smirked, so proud of himself for that moment.

"Sorry," I winced, quite embarrassed.

"You're ridiculous." He smiled, unbelieving of how clumsy I could be when my guard was down.

"Take a shower. It'll wake you up." He added, finally pulling me upwards to stand on my own two feet.

"Ok," I grouched, dusting myself off.

"Here, I'll walk you out," He followed me to his door, opening it for me as he proceeded into the hall and took my hand in the crook of his arm. I knew it was only for the sake of publicity; so his country would think him human enough to want to find a woman. But sometimes, I forgot it was all just a game.

Sometimes, I let myself believe we had something- And we did... in a way. Kado and I became attached to one another in that way friends do; trust and reliance was implied. He used my music to soothe him whenever the world overwhelmed him. He used me to convince his people he had a heart. I used his generosity to stay away from a war-ridden place. I used him to avoid the loneliness that came with being separated from my family.

I think we enjoyed each other's company nonetheless; at least when we weren't annoying one another to no end.

"So what am I to expect tonight?" I asked, the infernal silence starting to drive me mad.

"Just a few hours of subpar champagne, too expensive oerdeurves, arrogant, upperclass, ancient snobs, and infernal lines of question." God sometimes his negativity was repulsive. He saw me shake my head in disappointment and scoffed, "perhaps the occasional compliment on how pretty your hair is." but he always recompensed.

"You think my hair is pretty Kade?" I teased, nudging him with a sneer.

"I just started tolerating you Pena. Don't ruin it for yourself." He said, his childish smile betraying him.

"Nothing to be ashamed of. I think your hair is pretty." I admitted, the words leaving my mouth before I thought them through.

"Not a very popular opinion around here." He said.

"Have you ever said thank you before?" I asked, genuinely curious.

He looked at me with furrowed brows, a bit insulted.

"Don't get me wrong, I know you're so used to having everyone at your beckon call, but have you ever actually thanked anyone for anything?" I asked, still smiling.

Sometimes, I think he was taken aback by how relaxed I was around him. He thought I still saw him as the little boy who pushed me around and stole my toys.

"Are you calling me rude?" He accused.

"Only slightly," I lied, my socks sliding on the floor as I barely even lifted my feet.

"You're not exactly the picture of courtesy." he shot back, looking down at my feet as if i was pretending to ice skate.

"Ah yes but I have the excuse of not being raised in a castle." I raised a finger at him and he scoffed.

"Where were you raised? A barn?" He said, looking down at my too casual for a castle clothing.

"That's a cheap shot Kade, even for you." I smirked, unwilling to let him put my good mood down. I added, "I was raised in a forest actually, quite a beautiful one I might add. Of course, the town we had to go into wasn't the fanciest. It was necessary though, given my father's occupation." He seemed interested in what I had to say, curious even. The slight shift in tone of the conversation was not one I meant to set into motion.

"What did your father do?" He asked. I was reluctant to answer. He'd never asked me something that personal before. I wasn't sure I was ready for that yet.

"He's a leader- a soldier." I corrected, always thinking of my father in a more dignified light than I should've.

"In the war?"

I nodded.

"And your brother? What's his name?"

"Kali. He's a bit older than me- a soldier too." He nodded, making a mental note.

"Do you miss them?" He asked, his hands placed coyly behind his back as he continued down the hall with me.

"More than you know." I sighed, tugging at the pendant around my neck. Kado sensed my distress and quickly tried to make me smile again.

"Sometimes I wish I could get some time away from my brothers," I laughed.

"but if we're ever apart for more than a few days, we just start to miss each other." He drew his hair back with a single motion of his hand.

"You really love them don't you?" I asked, his smile telling me more than his words. His jaw flexed and he answered trying to be serious, "They're a pain the ass, but they're tolerable I guess." Oh what a boy.

"You're such a boy, Kade." I teased, his eyes rolling at me again.

"And what's that supposed to mean?" he was so sensitive despite his gruff exterior. I answered quite happily, "Boy's are scared to admit when they care about things. And I speak from experience." I pointed at his chest, unwilling to let him prove me wrong.

"That's preposterous. I'm not like that." he insisted, his forehead crinkled up.

"Mmm," I hummed. "You're wrong."

"I'm wrong am I?" He asked, only indulging me at that point.

"It's one of the rules remember?" I reminded him.

He stayed quiet after that, reminiscing on the rules we'd made together. There was such a nostalgic quality to the way he looked down at the glossy floors of the castle. Though it may have been only in his own mind, Kado had such a gentle approach to everything in his life. At every turn, he was defensive, angry, anxious, cold to the world around him. But if you only took a moment, you could tell that beneath that wall he put up for himself, there was something worth finding.

He was my little storm.

"So why do you like it?" He drew me out of a daze.

"Hm?"

"My hair. You said you liked it. Why?" oh, that.

I stumbled over my words, "It's a kind of compliment to your personality." I made up on the spot.

"How so?" He asked. I couldn't very well tell him it was such a beautiful, passionate color that I wanted for myself rather than the dull, nauseating yellow on my head.

"Your hair may be obnoxious and a little angry looking," I said, one of his eyebrows drawing up.

"but it's quite unique. It's soft and subtly inhuman." I said, stopping in the hall, the door to my room too close. I didn't want to stop speaking with him, my only solution to just make time stop.

"Doesn't sound like much of compliment." He said, his hands placed firmly in his pockets as he turned to face me.

"You're wrong about that too." I smiled, never letting my gaze drift from his own.

"I also like the color; that shade of red. It's powerful." Damn my pride. He deserved to know what I thought. Trust, right?

"I don't. Like you said it's a little obnoxious," He said, gazing up at the few locks out of place.

"I would've prefered something a little more… normal." He said, fixing on me again.

"Normal's boring." I whispered, only noticing now how close he'd gotten to me, his body facing mine.

"Only for people like us," He smiled, his chin tilted down to stare into me. I closed my eyes and smiled, whispering back, "Aye, only for people like us."

Suddenly, Kado's eyes drew above my head and away from mine, staring at something in the distance. As I turned to look at whatever caught his attention, he stopped me, grabbing my hip and holding me so that we remained face to face.

"Don't freak out ok?" He whispered, his eyes tender and warm despite the darkness beginning to take hold of the hall around us.

Afraid of what he meant, I stayed perfectly still, silent, my muscles tensed up like , his fingers drew up to meet my jawline, the entirety of his hand covering my cheek. He felt warm against the cold of my skin, his hand shifting to cup my face.

"What are yo-

Then his his lips came down on mine, stealing the words from my mouth. I gasped slightly, the unexpected feeling sending shivers through my spine. My eyes remained open, but they closed as I relinquished in the taste of him.

Kado let a heavy breath go when he tasted me, as if he'd been waiting for it a long time. His lips were bigger than my own, almost wrapping around me as he kissed me. Only staying there against me for a few seconds, he took my bottom lip into his mouth. Softly, gently he kissed, but still there was a certain hunger in the way he held me. His soft spoken colon and some indescribable scent that could only be his own made its way into me and paralyzed the rest of my muscles. I tried to kiss him back, artlessly if anything. In the hold of his hands, I reached up for his neck with a single palm and he pulled me up by my waist onto my tiptoes.

It was only when he let go, I took a breath myself. His nose was nuzzled up against mine and I heard him swallow and bite his lip. When I pulled my face away, I saw the restraint in his eyes. He was holding himself back from doing it again.

"Pena," he whispered, objecting to my pulling away. I was breathless, my mouth feeling the separation from him all too much.

Still, the bite of reality kept my mind wary of him.

"Did you do that because you wanted to?" I asked, noticing his gaze still piercing through me.

"Or because of the camera behind that pillar?" He didn't even look away from me, but there was a difference in how he looked once he heard my words. He knew I wasn't stupid, but sometimes he let the fact that I was a woman cloud his judgment.

The lust was gone from him and he sighed, controlling himself again. I had a sense he kissed me for the sake of his own publicity. But he wanted to do it again for a different reason.

"I'll see you at the banquet Pena." He said quietly, feeling the need to say my name as much as he possibly could.

"It should be fun," He added, placing his hands back behind him.

He went to walk past me, leaning down to whisper something in my ear, "Thank you," his words stung me, but not in the way you'd think. It made my body stir, made me want to follow him back to his room and argue with him again, let him take me over; no matter his motives.

But I didn't.

"What for?"

His face turned and he smirked over his shoulder.

"Kissing me back,"

Kado POV

Banquets were never really my thing. They were good for business; a promotion angle I could use. Sure, I preferred a meeting room with a single long table and two chairs at the heads to strike deals rather than a ballroom. However, when nobles with more money than sense were drunk out of their minds, it was easier to manipulate their coinpurses. There is no greater friend to deception than alcohol. At least that's what my father said when he taught me how to rouse donations for the troops.

The Hunger Banquet was no different; just a way to stock up on money to feed the starving soldiers on our borders. I found it ironic that an event meant to raise money for the hungry was serving $600 bottles of champagne and equally uselessly expensive dinner plates. The entire ballroom itself was decorated in lavish strings of argent, the tables crystalline white with only hints of silver outlining them. Grey and gold were the colors of the crown, the silver and white quite understated compared to the usual eccentric flashes of money we threw around to appeal to our country.

Women wore dresses of navy blues, blacks, dark greens, and other mind numbingly boring colors. Men wore their monkey suits, my own quite tight around the neck. As I went to adjust my tie, Harry dusted off my arm.

"Kado," he called, trying to fix the mess that I was.

"Your hair," His quiet voice mumbled, motioning for me to fix it.

I tried to comb it back with my hands unsuccessfully. It was really starting to become a hassle to even have it on my head. The only thing that made me want to keep it was the memories of my mother coursing her hands through it trying to comfort me. Getting rid of my hair was getting rid of the memory.

"How have you been?" I asked my little brother, only now noticing his blue hair had been cut slightly shorter in a Phoenix's layer style. He shrugged, smiling with the shy full joy he was known for.

"It's stressful sometimes; having to try and find a girl in front of millions of people," He said, trying to keep himself from sounding weak by straightening.

"But I'm starting to get to know them and I just feel like some of the girls bring out something in me I didn't know I had. It's pretty cool knowing that one of them is going to marry me." His hands were shoved in his pockets as if he was ashamed, but I couldn't have been more pleased with how he composed himself.

"I know you don't get it." He said, a certain confusing drawing over me when I realized he didn't think I could at least be proud of him. "I know you just want this to be over so you can go back to only focusing on your war, but," He paused, noticing how hurt I was, I think.

"Never mind. I get how you must be feeling." He corrected himself, but still I knew he thought I was wrong.

"Harry," I muttered, calling him back to me.

"I know I don't say it enough," his little blue eyes looked up at me so innocent looking, his maturity not yet apparent in his youth. "but all I've ever wanted since the day each of you were born; Kent, Kine, and you all the same; was for you to be happy."

He smiled, pulling the sleeves of his tuxedo down to cover his wrists.

"What's so funny?" I asked, trying to smile with him.

"Nothing, nothing," He insisted, scoffing a laugh away. I gave him a serious look that meant echoed the words tell me without ever being spoken.

"We've always been happy Kado; you've always been a good brother. You just forget about your own happiness sometimes. I think that's where you're wrong about the selection. Maybe there really is a girl here who could make you happy."

Harry was much more intelligent than I gave him credit for. He knew Pena and I were only involved in a kind of business partnership, although the parameters of that were beginning to become unclear. Little by little we were starting to get closer. I trusted her with things I didn't even trust my brothers with at that point; my piano, my songs, my music, my bedroom, my paperwork, my thoughts, my memories. They were all starting to become hers just as much as mine.

As Harry and I stood by the entrance to the ballroom, a few reporters came in to interview us. As per my father's instructions, I answered a few brief questions on the selection; about its affect on my brothers, the castle, how it brought new cultures and experiences, etc. Whenever a question about Pena came up I simply nodded my head saying it was too soon for me to single out any women. If I had to smile any longer I swear my face would've broken in two.

Harry was adorable and charming as always, naming the few girls he'd gone on dates with and how they touched him. God, he made me seem like I kept my heart in a fridge at night.

"Heads up ladies and gentlemen the fun one has arrived," Kine cooed, wearing a tuxedo perfectly fitted to him, custom made, and more expensive than Harry and I's combined. The spoiled brat did not disappoint when it came to eccentrics.

"Oh god," I mumbled, watching Kine stroll in with a long stride and open arms to welcome the flashing cameras. With a prideful smirk he walked out in front of Harry and I, grabbing the edges of his tuxedo's opening to make his chest appear less flat and bony.

At least he was getting enough attention for me and Harry to slip out unnoticed.

"What a peacock," Harry laughed, following me into the ballroom filled with waiters carrying silver platers of drinks and oeur d'heurves. The stage beheld a small orchestra led by an aged conductor my father had known for year. A single lonely microphone stood at the center of the stage begging for a beautiful woman to take it to her lips.

Pena would look good up there, I thought to myself, picturing her there in her big fuzzy socks and boy shorts, shyly singing to a crowd of people; a people who would soften at the sound of her voice.

"Hey," Kent called, holding a glass of champagne and nervously pacing back and forth. This was his big night after all.

"Hey, are you okay? You look a little jittery." Harry said with concern.

"yeah, yeah, I'm fine," he said, sipping the drink unconvingly.

His gaze met mine and he spat out some of the alcohol.

"Oh god, Kado your hair. Your hair. You said you'd take care of it. Jesus Christ you look like you should be pelted by tomatoes- no, no. you look like you're wearing a wig that was pelted by tomatoes."

"Kent calm down, no one's going to be paying attention to my head." I assured him.

"Yeah, this your night. Everyone is going to be completely focused on you." Harry wasn't the best at comforting people in times of stage fright.

"That doesn't make me feel any better. They'll want me to talk about the selection. I thought this thing was supposed to be over by now." Kent was full of nervous ticks, his fingers fidgeting on the glass.

"It's been like three weeks dude." I reminded him, exasperated by the matter myself.

"and still I have no girl that even begins to meet my standards."

"then lower them." Bad move Harry.

"Shut it smurf head." Kent yelled.

"Hey, hey no need to bite his head off. Let's remember where we are." I tried calming the situation down a bit, the nobles still walking in starting to stare.

"I'm sorry Harry. I'm just a little on edge." Kent said, lowering his voice. Harry nodded, silenced as he wasn't used to being yelled at.

"I read your speech Kent. They're going to love it." I patted his back, feeling his lungs tight. He needed to breath.

"Well if a carping, pessimistic old sod like you liked it, maybe it's worth a shot." Kent smiled, reminding me of when I was in his position three years ago in my 18th year.

"Go get em,"

Harry and I each patted Kent's shoulders as he walked to the service hall, going through the kitchen in order to reach the wings of the stage. He wasn't supposed to give his speech until about an hour after everyone had arrived. Still, the fusspot wanted to make sure everything was perfect.

"Where's Kine?" Harry asked, adjusting his suit sleeves needlessly.

"Still peacocking," I answered, looking down the long red carpeted stairs at the paparazzi father foolishly let into the castle. Publicity is good for business and what not, but it was a risk. When Pena came in wearing pants and a t-shirt or worse everyone would expect us to mingle and act like we were a couple. Dad wasn't too happy about my show of favoritism towards her. But hey it got him upset enough to actually pay attention to me on the subject of war. My father may have been insensitive but he was an intelligent man. He could tell Pena and I were in no way in love with one another like the selection suggested we should be. He realized what I was doing and struck a deal to make the best of the situation. Our deal included me continuing my 'romance' with Pena while appearing to keep my options open. In exchange, he actually would read through my ideas, present them if he thought them equal to his own. Still, he made it clear this selection was ending with a ring on my finger…

Other noble men my age were starting to keep their eyes open for the rejects of the selection; wanting their own wives to aid their social status. Dad convinced us to keep Katherine in the running because she was a favorite, Kent, Kine, and Harry preaching for three to four girls while I kept my mouth shut. I gave the strategic reasons for Pena and Katherine's remaining in the selection; two favorites on the arm of the heir was always a plus. The people seemed to like Pena's casual nature, how down to earth she was. They admired her beauty, her defiance, as most subjects of the crown do. If only they knew how domineering she could be.

Speaking of domineering, here came my brother, accompanied by three noble boys we grew up with. Jason Tarley, Stephen Huxley, and Arthur Ferway. I hated all three of them; each one of them more arrogant than Kine and without the redeeming quality of being tolerable.

Jason thought he could have any girl in the world simply because of his money, Stephen wanted to rule the world and he wasn't subtle about it. And arthur was just an asshole.

"Kado, Harry!" Arthur welcomed us with open arms, tan from his trip back from whatever tropical place he decided to hide away.

"Hey guys," Stephen, went to shake Harry's hand and planted a friendly embrace on him. Both knew better than to try and touch me.

"Kaddddo," Jason went to reach to shake my hand. I did not welcome his casualty. Instead, I let my arms hang at my sides, ignoring the motion of his hand facing me.

"You rotten old boy, you've always been so formal haven't you," he smiled, patting my back with a loud thump that made me want to throw him down the stairs.

Watch yourself Tarley, I thought, my eyes burning holes through him.

"How have you been? The crown feeling heavy yet?" Jason asked, laughing as his yellow hair was cast back in a crazy amount of gel.

I was better before you showed up.

"Been fine,"

He laughed, Arthur coming up behind him to greet me.

"We've been watching the selection; you've got some real pretty girls here," Arthur said, grabbing a champagne glass from a passing waitress, staring at her ass as she walked away.

"Aye they're lovely," Harry said, attempting to own his humility among the group of boys with less class than pigs.

"Lovely's a word," Stephen murmured, rousing a chuckle from the other two.

"Have you found out just how lovely some of them are?" Jason nudged Kine's arm as if he were a fourteen year old boy trying to get the gossip on who'd fucked who. Actually that was exactly what he was doing.

"No no boys, that's against the rules until the wedding bells remember?" Stephen joked.

"Aye, but the rejects are fair play until their suitcases are packed are they not?" I may not have been the most gentlemanly when it came to women, but Arthur made me look like a feminist.

"I liked the young one with the light blonde hair, what was her name? Kasia?" Stephen said. Kine looked upset at his words. Kine may have played all this off as just a fun little game for him to test his prowess with girls, but he'd come to care for a few. Having to let Kasia go was hard on him.

"She had a nice little walk that one. Why'd you have to let her go ey Kine?"  
As I saw his face shift slightly and his head dip into his glass, my mouth went ahead of my head, "Have some Respect." They all turned to me, unused to my voice in the conversation.

"They're still people after all," None had the audacity to laugh at my words, but I could tell Jason was holding himself back from chuckling at my sudden defense of women.

"It was only a compliment," Stephen defended

"Aye. We're honoring them," Arthur held up a glass. They obviously didn't know the difference between honoring and demeaning. Perhaps they thought because of where they stood in the world, their mentioning of someone was an honor to whoever they were mentioning.

Honoring them like prized horses at a fair, I thought, taking my first long drag of alcohol, unwilling to talk with these men sober.

Kent returned, bear hugging his friends he hadn't seen in some time and joining the conversation that had me looking for a noose.

"Are there any you're just keeping for appearances? I'd like to weigh my options tonight," Jason said, entitled as ever. I wanted to take him by the scruff of his shirt and tell him exactly where he could weigh his options. Alas, his dad owned a weapons manufacturing company. Sadly needed at this point in time.

"Afraid not. I haven't really begun ruling out any of them yet," Kine said, still thinking of Kasia. I could tell he missed her. Father shouldn't have pressured him. He should've given him more time to decide.

"You've got some pretty little ones on your roster don't you." Arthur said, watching some of the selected walk up the stairs and into the ballroom.

Beatrix and some other girl who's name I couldn't remember walked in together, Beatrix's navy blue matching the orangy color of her hair. She looked over at Kine for a second, smiling as she put her head back down and walked into the white and silver of the ballroom.

"You boys don't realize quite the opportunity you have," Jason laughed. God could they think of anything but sex?  
As the other selected began coming in, two by two, the question answered itself quite readily.

"What about you Harry? You've got any to spare?" If any of them tried taking advantage of Harry one more fucking time, I swore I'd throw them through the windows.

Harry shook his head no, meeting the eyes of the youngest in the selected, a little African girl barely sixteen years old. She was such a little thing; one of the only ones I actually saw innocence in.

Arthur's eyes lingered a little too long on the long black hem of her dress and Harry cleared his throat authoritatively.

Good boy. I thought to myself.

"Kent?" Stephen questioned. If any of us were going to let them take a shot at one of the selected it would be him.

"No, no. Sorry to disappoint, but I'm not sharing anytime soon," Kent never made any eye contact with any of the girls that walked up. Neither did I, but well you know where I stood on the selection.

The rest of the selected came through all wearing dark, dull colors, some more overstated than others. The little music of the orchestra began playing and the banquet had all its guests mingling around the room; with the expection of a few remaining nobles and… pena.

"What about you Kado?" Jason asked, playing with fire a little too closely.

"What about me?" I asked, keeping my eyes fixed on the banquet room, observing the men I'd have to talk to about the strategies of regaining the Barren's border.

"Everyone knows you're pretty reclusive when it comes to your girls." Jason added, looking down at the red-carpeted staircase himself.

"Are you going to be generous?" Since when was I ever generous. My ability to never show emotion ceased for only a second as I pictured my fist breaking his nose.

"He doesn't give a crap." Kent said, surprising all of us.

"He thinks this is a waste of time, don't you Kado?" Oh that conniving little parasite. He wanted me to admit it. He wanted me to admit in front of all my brothers and all their friends that I, the heartless, always composed, always quiet prick of prince let myself fall for a girl.

He was wrong. And I wasn't going to let him win this one.

"Right." I said with shrug, Jason smirking so wildly his face should've broken in two.

"I especially liked the one with rapunzel hair; the one with those really sexy eyes," Jason commented to Arthur. Those eyes are mine. I surprised myself at the spiteful threat in my thoughts.

Both of them chuckling as they talked about what they fantasized doing to her. Considering I entertained the idea of hanging them for even touching her, this was crossing a line. Pena was not my love, but as far as they were concerned she was mine. If they only know how under the monotone expression of my face I was plotting ways to torture them just for the way they spoke about her.

The orchestra got a bit louder, the slight sound of a base intensifying as they shifted keys. My father entered the room, everyone bowing their heads or curtsying only slightly for their monarch. He was wearing the grey and gold of his house, his beard shaven clean. It took years off him I admit. But my brothers and the pirannah's eyes were not on my father. All of them were focused on something at the bottom of the stairs.

"Um, Kado…" Harry muttered, placing his hand on my shoulder to call my attention over to what he was staring at.

"What?"

He pointed slightly to the flashing cameras and rowdiness of paparazzi being held back by large security guards. Their excitement was much greater than for their princes' arrivals, or even the king's for that matter.

Beyond the flashing of the cameras was the silhouette of a woman.

Tall and thin, she walked up the stairs with a column cut dress; a currant red that was more powerful than any color in the room. Gold stencils shimmered slightly on the cuts of her waist and up the sides of her torso. The golden line followed down the sides of her legs, long open slits in her dress reaching from the top of her thigh to the hem of the dress.

The material clung to her body like a second skin, the temptation in a single bared shoulder overshadowed by the grace in the way she moved. Her hips, her mile long legs, her breasts, and everything on her body I'd ceased to notice before was shown to me in that dress. And it made me want to tear it off her.

Pena had never worn makeup before today, something else I hadn't noticed. The black of her outstretched eyelashes, the dark lines drawing her eyes, the red lips matching her dress, it all bled of power, dominance, a beauty that could only be found in a queen.

And that's exactly what she was that night.

I found myself staring at her, as did everyone else in the room when she walked in. Her eyes never met mine once.

Instead she walked past me without even a flicker of interest in those big blue eyes I wanted to look into before I kissed her again.

"No offense Kado," Jason's voice was only slightly audible over the blood rushing through my ears as I looked at the girl no one else could have.

"But you're an idiot if you think _that_ is a waste of time."  
I ignored him, desperate to walk over to her, to talk to her, to carry her back to my room and show her how much I wanted her.

But she was angry at me that much was obvious. the kiss I gave her in the hall a publicity stunt for my image. And she knew it.

Maybe I did only want to kiss her for a picture in the newspaper, but once I touched her, once she started kissing me back…

She was standing at the bar with her friends, her predatory, superior stare glancing across the room. She wasn't searching for me, but it was nice pretending she was.

As I went to walk over to her, Kent reached his arm out to stop me and I swear I was entransed enough to break it off him.

"Remember what father said." he said calmly, looking up at me with dead serious eyes. "I'm sorry I played around with you, but if you go talk to her, dad is gonna have your head." He reminded me, making my blood stir all the more.  
"Talk to her once the banquet is over."

I wanted to head over there more than anything, not just because of how she looked, but because of how much I needed to talk to her. I still had enough power to recollect myself, to take a deep breath and let myself look away from her; focus myself back to what needed to be done.

But this was. Not. over.

Pena POV


End file.
